From the Heart

Somewhere Over TheRainbow

2012-01-20T12:46:00.000-08:00

We have three little angels in heaven.

This song always makes me think of them.

But only this version.

Today this song makes my heart smile.

30 Weeks

2012-01-20T08:09:00.000-08:00

I go back and forth on where to post pregnancy related photos, feelings, thoughts, etc...here or on "Herm's" blog. I've decided that "Herm's" blog is more about letters to him from me and this one is just about anything, really. About life, I guess.

Anyway, here is a picture of Danielle and I at the Peter Kirk baby shower.

Me = 30 weeks, Danielle = 37 weeks

Our little boys will be friends.

I'm so thankful that I have Danielle, a close friend, who has also been pregnant the same time that I have. She's about 7 weeks ahead of me, and she has a similar story. It's great to compare and talk about our pregnancies. The reassurance has been appreciated.

Danielle, you've kept me grounded. We've laughed together...and laughed at others. We've made a pact to get back in shape after the babies are here. We've also made a deal with one another that if we are still packin' on the pounds a year after the babies are here that we can support each other to "get our acts together". I simply love your positive outlook on life...it's contagious. I look forward to the days of our little boys playing together and us sipping on our beers, poolside, in the summer time.

Thanks for being a great friend, Danielle.

Snow, Snow, Snow

2012-01-19T18:54:00.000-08:00

The past week we have been hit with a snow storm and as I sit in the kitchen and stare out the window, it continues to snow. Chad and I have ventured out a few times and last night as we were driving around we were talking about how all the snow makes us miss Idaho. We both wish that at least for a month we could have continued snow here; although, what a disaster that would be with the crazies around her. Not to mention that Western Washington does not have the equipment to maintain that kind of snow levels. Nonetheless, we sure do enjoy it and the memories it sparks from living in Idaho. (Sorry Sonja, no plans of moving back to Idaho.)

With the snow, brings snow days or days away from school. School was canceled the past two days and at the rate the snow is falling today, we probably won't have school tomorrow either. Every snow day missed during our regularly scheduled school days we have to make up at the end of the school year. YUCK! This means that we are currently in school until June 26th. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I can only hope that we don't have a 4th of July assembly. If that's the case, I might strongly consider extending my maternity leave.

In other news...Peter Kirk had a baby shower for Danielle and I. It was a lot of fun. Low key, great food, great drinks (I only had a couple little sips) no lame games and just hanging out. The staff got our babies newborn matching outfit sets (our babies are 7 weeks apart) and one other larger gift. I got one of these...

...a moby wrap. I've heard great things about this baby-carrier-contraption and it's very popular in Europe and the middle east. It's supposed to be excellent for your back too. I've heard it's quite comfortable...we'll see how it goes. How lucky I am to be working at such a loving, positive and supportive school. The community at PK is truly one of the best.

Mom is planning a family/family friend baby shower in February. I'm really looking forward to this. I'm excited to see everyone and to just enjoy the day. The big party will be after "Herm" arrives...we won't be holding back...our neighbors might even dislike us for a while as we party it up with family and friends. I'm okay with this..."Herm's" worth every moment of celebration.

Here are a few pictures. Enjoy...

Family Christmas photo.

Snowy house.

Looking into our snowy cul-de-sac.

Everyone should be jealous of my socked-flip-flopped-Vanna-White-reindeer-mail-retriever.

(He's so cute.)

Hunkering down for another snow day...I just received a call from the school district stating that there is no school tomorrow. Fourth of July school assembly is just around the corner.

What A Year It's Been

2011-12-31T15:14:00.000-08:00

First off...Happy New Year to all my family and friends. What an exciting year it has been.

I came across this on a new favorite website at www.pinterest.com. The website is a time sucker, but nonetheless an absolutely fun place to get ideas for the classroom, to decorating, to gardening, to fashion, to favorite recipes...it's all there. Here's the idea I thought was great and I think I am going to use this in my classroom. Like most things that I do with my students, I generally do the same project to get an idea for what my expectations would be for their age level and to have an example for them. Plus, it gives them a little bit more of an inside as to what their teacher is really like. Here it is...(You can also go to the website in the bottom right hand corner of the picture to actually print this out.)

So what a year it's been for me...

A Little About Me

Name: Robin

Age: 33 (almost 34, yikes)

Favorite Color: Red

Favorite Food: Mexican or Thai

Favorite Activity: Knitting, running, being with friends, watching movies

Favorite Book: I really don't have one...

...I like the author Roald Dahl and

I recently enjoyed the book Bossy Pants by Tina Fey.

Highlights From 2011

Greatest Lesson Learned: God never fails and it's all on His timing.

Hardest Thing of the Year: Trusting in God.

Favorite Memory: Seeing our baby's heartbeat.

What I Loved Most About 2011: Realizing just how blessed we are to be loved by so many people.

Blessed almost seems like a cliche word to use...

...its downright unbelievable how loved and fortunate we are.

Looking Forward to 2012

Want to Learn: I want to learn how not to get caught up in the little things

that don't matter in the big picture of life.

I also want to learn how to sew...

...something I've mentioned the past couple of years...

...maybe this is the year.

Want to Get Better At: I want to get better at being devoted to my husband,

and I want to lessen my "piles" around the house, in the classroom, etc.

Biggest Goal: To be a relaxed new mommy...

...and learn as I go...

...and learn from mistakes.

Eeeek! I can't wait to do this with my kiddos. They are going to love this!

Happy New Year everyone.

Lots of love,

Robin

Miracle

2011-12-19T11:21:00.000-08:00

Yesterday in church, someone who I truly value the words they share, came up to me and shared that this Christmas for Chad and I will be something extra special. Extra special because of God's love. Extra special because of the miracle of having a baby on the way. He also shared that he knew that God would not let us down and that one day we would become parents. He just knew. This man has a Godly heart and I truly appreciate the prayers, words of wisdom and loving, gentle soul that he has shared with Chad and I.

Yes, this Christmas is going to be extra special because we have a baby on the way. God's miracle of creation. We are so blessed.

Merry Christmas.

These Are A Few of My Not-So-Favorite Things...

2011-12-11T22:12:00.000-08:00

For the most part I have absolutely enjoyed every minute of being pregnant. I think this is true partly because it has taken a lot of work to get to where we are and I really have enjoyed being pregnant. Even through the morning sickness, which there are days still, I just smile because its just another sign that all is right in Herm's world.

However, there has been a few small things that I haven't enjoyed as much...

I miss my clothes or at least a variety of things to wear. Sounds materialistic, I know.
I miss eating seafood. I know I could eat it, but the thought of even being near the smell of it stirs up nausea.
I miss deli sandwiches. The one thing my doctor---whom, I love--said I should avoid...everything else she said to take in moderation.
I miss sleeping on my stomach.
I miss winter beer...although I've stolen a couple sips here and there, its just not the same.
I wish my winter coat fit; however, I do like that Herm sticks out to stay "hello" to the world.
I really don't enjoy the bloody noses, or all the extra snot and phlegm--every morning.
Although funny, I wish when I sneezed I didn't pee my pants just a little...every time. Which I understand this doesn't go away. Ever.
I could do without the leg cramping and I'm sure Chad could do without the bloody screaming in the middle of the night when the cramp takes over my entire lower body...or at least that's what it feels like.
Heartburn? I think that is just beginning.
I don't think I would mind the constant urge to have to pee, but as a teacher this is challenging.

I'm not complaining. Really. These are just a few things that have changed in my life in the past 7-10 days of the pregnancy.

Oh. And the hairy belly? I actually don't mind it. I'm kind of fascinated it by it. I also don't mind Herm's new burrowing action. Or at least that is what it feels like...as if he is trying to escape.

Pregnancy is such an odd, mysterious, fascinating and miraculous occurrence.

Frequent Stop-ins

2011-12-05T18:51:00.000-08:00

I'd really like to think that I blog more frequently than I do, but the reality of it is...I don't. I enjoy blogging because it is a great outlet for my emotions and thoughts. I don't even care if anyone is reading my blog...I just enjoy "journaling"...if you will. I would like to be more than just a frequent stop-in to my blog, but for now my blog will have to get the attention that it gets.

When I found out I was pregnant (again) I decided to start a separate blog for the baby (http://weebabymoon.blogspot.com/) and I'm glad I did. It's been a great way for me to connect to the baby because in the beginning I was afraid to get too attached for fear of losing him. I thought I would share a few things that I have enjoyed about being pregnant...

hearing the baby's heartbeat
happily sharing great news with people that love us (the love is overwhelming, by the way)
feeling the healthiest I have felt in a long time
my hair is thick...really thick...thicker than usual
not feeling guilty about eating a fudgesicle oh so frequently (or maybe two in one sitting)
honestly...enjoying regular bowel movements
sharing the excitement with my kids at school...it's so fun to see how excited they get
talking to Gia (niece) about the baby and seeing that look of excitement-amazement-wonderment in her eyes
knowing that God is taking care of me and the baby (this has been challenging, but I know He is there)
nightly talks with Chad about how we are going to parent...and the many things we laugh about because we have absolutely no clue
eating homemade bean burritos for breakfast (almost every day)
napping...and not feeling guilty about it
slowing my life down...and enjoying every minute of it
feeling the baby move...I can't explain the miracle-feeling of this...I don't want to take this for granted
again...the heartbeat...that precious, little sound of life

These are only a few that come to mind right away. I'm sure there are more.

I need to be better about blogging...Here's a picture of me at 24 weeks. I may or may not have popped a button on my jacket. Oops.

Gracious and Compassionate

2011-11-27T19:52:00.000-08:00

(Forewarning: an emotional pregnant woman is writing this post...it's long and all over the place.)

Today in church we sang a song about the Lord being gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. As I was listening to the worship band and the rest of the congregation sing this song, I couldn't help to think how the past 5 years I have been angry, discouraged and distant from God and my journey of becoming a mom has been challenging, emotionally and physically. Now that God has blessed me with the miracle of being pregnant, I probably haven't been thankful enough...because my heart hasn't been there. Outwardly, I'm excited and happy, but internally I struggle with this daily.

For all the anger and hate that I've had towards God he is still rich in love...for me, for Chad and for our dream of becoming parents. Wow, God is still rich in love. And although I'm thankful, my heart still holds back--so maybe I'm not fully thankful. I have placed distance from the Lord, distance from my baby and probably distance from Chad because of how selfish I am. I don't want to get hurt again. I don't want to fully believe that my baby is healthy and okay. It's almost as if I am just waiting for God to let me down...again. I feel this way and my God is still gracious and compassionate?

What is wrong with me? Why can't I fully be thankful for what God has given to me/us? Why can't I fully let my heart be happy and delighted that He has blessed us with a healthy baby boy? Why can't I fully forgive God for what he has put me/us through the past 5 years?

After worship, the pastor came to the front of the church and announced that there was going to be a baby dedication. I continued to have tears trickle down my cheeks...I couldn't pull it together. As a couple from our church came forth with their cute little baby boy my first thought was what if we don't ever get to be up front dedicating our baby to the Lord. What if? Why would I even think that? I know our baby is healthy. The doctors are certain and I've seen our little boy with my own eyes. Why can't I be certain? Why can't I let the anger and mistrust go? This particular couple that was dedicating their adorable baby boy have a similar story as Chad and I in trying to start a family. I truly couldn't be happier for this couple.

The other emotions that were stirred today is the guilt of forgetting about our other babies. The babies that were lost and now with the Lord in Heaven. In the midst of trying to be excited and slowly getting more excited about being 5 1/2 months pregnant, I felt guilty for letting our other 3 babies go. Letting them go and knowing that one day I will see them in Heaven, but almost letting them go to the point of forgetting about them because so many great things have been happening with this pregnancy. I have a necklace that a friend made me and on this necklace are the birthstones of our three other babies. Maybe I should wear this more regularly as a reminder that God has and continues to bless me with my dreams of becoming a mom.

He is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. I've got a lot to learn from my loving God.

So Many Emotions...

2011-10-18T20:48:00.000-07:00

This morning I awoke feeling okay. I felt like it was going to be a good day. Usual routines occurred and all was going well. I had a feeling to check Facebook, which I find odd, because I generally leave my Facebook stalking to the evening. However, this morning was different...

I came across a post from a friend and it read, " The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." Job 1:21.

My heart immediately sank to my stomach and my chest felt heavy. My eyes instantly filled with tears and the worst thought crossed my mind...something's not right...she's lost her baby.

I can't explain the feelings that rushed through me...possibly a combination of hate, anger and fear. Everything that I have felt in the past due to our three losses overcame me. I couldn't stop crying. I try to understand, but I can't. I may never understand. I wish I could accept that, but it's difficult. I want to know "why".

I'm 4 months, 2 weeks and 1 day (but who's counting). I was beginning to feel comfortable. Feeling as if everything is going to be okay. As those feelings rushed over me this morning, it made me question, "Am I going to be okay?", "Is my baby going to be okay?", "Why, God, WHY?" "Why does someone else have to endure the pain of loss?" He makes me so angry. Furious. I was just gaining trust in the Lord and I feel like the news this morning pushed me further away rather than drawing me closer to Him. I'm on guard...stepping back and distancing myself...not completely, but a little bit.

My friend is strong, unbelievably strong. She continues to trust in the Lord even after He has taken something away from her. I pray that I can be more like her, strong like her, and continue to trust in the Lord like her. I also pray that the Lord will carry her and her husband through this loss, bring them closer together and surround them with those that love them.

It's been a very long and emotional day. Let's hope tomorrow is better.

Hello?

2011-10-15T21:04:00.000-07:00

Hello. It's been a while. I've been a little preoccupied...a new house, teaching at a new school and a new grade, AND we have a baby on the way. Thus, my time and my mind has been a little preoccupied. It's mid October! Wait a second...it's already mid October?

Quick updates...

Found out I was pregnant the 3rd week in July.
Found out I got a job teaching 5th grade the same day I found out I was pregnant. (Talk about an emotional day.)
Teaching at my former school, Peter Kirk. Love it!
Started another blog where I share thoughts about this pregnancy.
Slowly let family and close friends know we were having a baby.
School started...September and October are always busy.
Let the principal know about the baby....she was elated.
The rest of the staff found out a couple weeks later...they couldn't believe it beings that Kirk has had 5 babies in less than a year.
First trimester I was an emotional wreck...so, so, SO glad I am past that. Well, still a little emotional, but not that emotional.
Shared with our church that we were having a baby.
Not sure of my 5th graders.
Shared with my school-parents that I was having a baby...they were excited, but I think with a little hesitation.
Went on a 3-day, 2-night adventure with 75 5th graders and a few other teachers. Crazy? Yes. Did we have a lot of fun? Absolutely!
Incredibly exhausted from camp.
Road trip to Prosser-Moscow-Prosser for Idaho Homecoming. Lame game, but fun to be back in Moscow and run into friends.
Still recuperating from camp, but had to keep pushing forward.
Conferences...ugh!
Into second trimester...pregnancy "symptoms" kicked up a notch, but extremely happy about this.
Ferry ride to Kingston with Barrans to see Toomey's.
Slumber party with the Barrans' babes.
Exhausted, but worth every minute.

Life will slow down this week...conferences are coming to an end and fall is officially here. This means knitting, chai lattes, cozy comforters, football, and our annual fall get away to Fort Flagler. (Huge sigh of relief.)

If interested in checking out the baby blog here is the link...http://weebabymoon.blogspot.com/

I hope fall will also allow for more time for blogging.

Sending love to all.

Robin

A New Race to the Calendar

2011-08-12T07:42:00.000-07:00

I have a select few races that I do every year...or at least try to. I train throughout the winter and the races start in the spring. March to be exact. The first on the list is always the Seattle St. Paddy's Day race. This is a 4 mile race with A LOT of Irish spirit...I even dress up and I'm not Irish.

A few weeks later in April I enjoy running the 5-mile Tulip Run. This race is completely opposite of the St. Paddy's race. The race has a few hundred people, it's out in the middle of nowhere and the course winds through muddy trails. It's quite peaceful actually.

In May, always the first Sunday in May, we take a trip to Spokane to partake in Bloomsday (about an 8-mile race). If you haven't experienced Bloomsday, I suggest you do. It used to be the largest timed race in the world (I don't know if it still is) with around 50,000 participants and it is a blast! I love the atmosphere of this race...the people warming up before hand, the crowd squeezing together to stay warm, the mad rush to cross the starting line (yes, the starting line), the spectators that line the streets, the costumes, the finishers t-shirt, the post race activities....it's all around a fun race experience. However, the first time you compete in Bloomsday, I suggest you don't get your hopes up on meeting your goal time...the crowd is tough. However, after the first year, your previous year's time qualifies you for a different color-coded-starting-position. The second year you participate is when you set your goals and go for it!

Finally, in June (the last Saturday in June) is the Seattle Rock & Roll half and marathon race. I've competed in this race twice now and without question will continue to keep this race on the calendar. However, I will only compete in the half (13.1 miles)....marathon runners are crazy...although, I am slightly intrigued. The before the race adventure and post race party is not that fun, but the course of the race is awesome...especially if running with other friends.

This year I added a new race to the calendar and will continue to partake in this race every year. The Seattle Seafair 5K. This race, by far, has the best pre and post celebrations. The course itself is awesome! The race starts at the Space Needle, heads south on 4th to Seneca, north on the top layer of the viaduct where we end up back at the Space Needle. The course through 4th is lined with thousands of spectators waiting for the torchlight parade, but they eagerly cheer the runners on. It's really a great feeling. In addition, there's always the race shirt and with most 5K's the race shirt is a T-shirt; however, the Seafair Race provides tech shirts by Brooks. Absolutely worth the race, in my opinion!

I was encouraged to do the Seafair Race from a teacher friend, who the past couple of years has inspired me to always strive to be a better teacher. I enjoyed the tables to be turned as throughout the race I felt like I was able to inspire her and enjoy our time together on a summer day. Thanks, Carolyn.

Here are a couple of pics from that day...

Idaho Camping

2011-08-08T14:06:00.000-07:00

The end of July we took a trip to Idaho and camped up the northfork of the Coeur d'Alene River. This is the 2nd year in a row that we have taken this trip and each year more people join in on the fun. Thanks Dad and Debbie for letting us camp down on the river.

Here are a ~~few~~ a lot of my favorite photos thanks to Molly.

Portland

2011-08-01T15:01:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've posted anything. I've been busy...I guess. I have photos from an Idaho camping trip, a day trip to Portland, a 5K race in Seattle and a visit from Mom and Eric that I would like to share.

I'll start with Portland....

I took a trip to Portland last Friday to meet up with Teagan. She had the day off, Kurt was out of town and I had time available. I don't have a picture of the two of us, but we did spend A LOT of our time walking around downtown Portland and especially on the waterfront. I was fascinated by this bridge that had to raise to let a Portland tour boat go under.

It was great to see Teags, as it had been since last Christmas since the last time we saw her and Kurt. We need to make mid-way meetings more often. I miss Teagan. It was a fun-filled day. Thanks for meeting up Teags. Love you.

July 4th

2011-07-12T09:06:00.001-07:00

The 4th of July is special to Chad and I for many reasons. For me, it's about the time we started dating...14 years ago. The 4th also stirs up many great childhood memories from watching the Coeurd'Alene firework show to going with Dad and Rolan to pick out a couple fireworks from a stand that sat in the old Tidyman's parking lot on Best Ave. to running through the colored smoke bombs on our neighborhood street.

Since being together with Chad, we have spent all but two Fourths on the river at the cabin. The 4th of July now equates to an extended stay at the cabin where card games, swimming, boating, jet skiing, kayaking, campfiring-ing and just plain fun takes place.

I love the tradition and look forward to many more 4ths at the cabin.

I'm so lucky...

2011-07-01T10:41:00.000-07:00

...because I'm married to him.

Sum-, Sum-, Summertime

2011-06-28T11:12:00.000-07:00

Summer has arrived! Vacation that is and not so much the weather. Our summers are usually booked way in advance; however, this summer seems to be different. We really don't have a lot of plans. There's the traditional trips to Idaho, Hannah Thursdays and Sunday softball with BBQs. Beyond that, not much will be going on.

I'm okay with that...I think. Generally I (we) keep our schedule packed. We like to socialize.

Over the weekend we met up with some friends from college who were visiting the area (always love seeing Rachel and Ben). The question was asked what we like to do for fun in our big city lifestyle. Both Chad and I hesitated because it doesn't seem like we live the "big city" life. Our fun times are shared with our friends. Sharing food, laughs and life basically. Occasionally we will venture out to a nice restaurant or maybe go see a show. Our comfort is in the homes of our friends. That's how it should be.

So cheers to summer being here and the great friends (and family) we will be spending it with.

And maybe a few Mariner games tossed into our schedule.

The Interim

2011-06-24T08:56:00.000-07:00

The school year has come to an end and not knowing where I will be for next year is tough. I know God has a plan and I'm fairly certain He wants me to be a teacher and working with kids; however, the unknown is difficult. Where am I going to be teaching next year? What staff will I be working with? What grade will I be teaching? How am I going to move my stuff from one classroom to the next? Where am I going to store all my stuff until then? What curriculum do I need to prepare for? Am I going to be teaching intermediate or primary?....It's all a little daunting, but I have faith. Faith that God will place me where I need to be. I just need to be patient and trust in Him.

God's Plan?

2011-06-07T20:29:00.000-07:00

Sure, emotions are a little raw because I just got off the phone and heard not so good news...
and then I thought for a while that maybe it's not the best time to blog...
and then I thought some more and I've decided that I'm going to blog anyway...

The not so good news? Well, I currently don't have a job for this next school year. Quite frankly, it sucks. It's hard to understand why God has me go through the challenges in life that I have to go through. And I know that He doesn't take away the things that I love to hurt me...because I have a loving God. Although, it's difficult to understand this.

We don't have kids and I would do anything to have our own. My kids are my students and to think about not having 20-plus students that I can open my heart to, share life with and teach to...it crushes me. Crushes me. My students are my kids...because I don't have any of my own. I think this is the toughest part to understand about the current not so good news. Why would God take this away from me?

How is it that awful teachers get to maintain their job? Lazy teachers? Teachers who don't care? Teachers who work the bare minimum or less? Teachers who are negative and only want what's best for them, not putting the student first? I DON'T UNDERSTAND AND THIS MAKES ME SO INCREDIBLY ANGRY! I have a loving God? Wait, let me rephrase that...I have a loving God.

I realize I'm in the moment, mad at the world (well, actually God...and maybe those lazy-good-for-nothing-I-don't-care-teachers) because I don't understand "Why?". I wish I knew what God has in store for me for this next school year...

Spring is in the air...(part II)

2011-06-01T22:14:00.000-07:00

I'm almost finished with the teaching of 6th grade Health/HIV-AIDS. I felt inclined to do a "part II" on this topic only because I said I would...and I should probably follow up with my few readers out there (Apparently, I have "readers"...who knew?).

It's been a journey. A fun-embarrassing-laughing-hiding-in-the-corner-curious journey for the 6th graders. I have a few students that ask question after question about anything and everything (I really wish I could share because it's so darn hilarious)...and then I have the students who can't even look at me in the hallway anymore. I find it all quite entertaining, really.

I do really want to believe in the 6th graders and their innocence, but then the reality sets in that my sweet, innocent 6th graders...well, maybe they aren't so innocent after all. This scares me...downright terrifies me actually. They are only eleven and twelve years old. ONLY ELEVEN AND TWELVE! I'm thankful my 6th graders are in an elementary school setting because I think having them in a middle school setting would provide more opportunities for risky behavior. (Although, there are many wonderful things about having the 6th graders in a middle school setting.)

Many have asked, "How do you teach that stuff?" Well, honestly, the first 10 minutes are awkward and then it gets easier...well, relatively easier. The first read aloud of the word penis brings a giggling snicker throughout the entire class, including myself. The giggling and snickers only get louder as the descriptions, definitions, pictures and questions get more in depth. (Did I mention that the snickers get louder from me too?) I merely look at this as an opportunity to make sure my students know the difference between making a risky behavior decision versus a safe decision.

Truthfully, I hope that I have given them just the right amount of knowledge, as well as, placed just the right amount of fear in them...they are only 11 and 12 after all.

Spring is in the air...

2011-05-24T23:07:00.000-07:00

...and so are 6th grade hormones.

(Warning: longer post)

I love teaching; I love every aspect of teaching. There is so much more to teaching than what many realize (an entirely separate post that I will probably never write about). I'm very passionate and dedicated to my teaching.

Let me rephrase that.

I'm dedicated and passionate about the safety, well-being and learning environment that I provide for my students.

What kind of teacher I am doesn't matter...it's all about my students. What kind of students I have, what their interests are, where they come from, what their background is, how they learn, what they like to learn about, what they don't like to learn about...Who they really are is what matters because once the time has been taken to figure that out (which is also a constant work in progress), everything else falls into place. I love this about my job (and I'm trying to not get teary-eyed about my students right now as another year is coming to an end).

However, nothing can prepare a teacher, absolutely NOTHING, for what 6th graders know or don't know about health/sex-ed/HIV-AIDS.

It's that time of year. I love this time of year (Of course, because I already stated that I love every aspect of teaching.)

Last year I was terrified to teach 6th grade Health. Partly because I giggle like a 6th grader when the word "penis" is said aloud (Come on...it's a funny word.), but also scared to teach health because it is a subject that seems to be (between student and teacher) unspoken and taboo, but then all of a sudden the subject matter is allowed to be discussed (within fairly-detailed-reason).

What should a 6th grader already know about health/sex-ed/HIV-AIDS? Well, they know A LOT more than what many parents, I'm sure, want to believe their children already know. I find this scary, yet also somewhat sad...and then it somewhat angers me.

Whenever sharing so-called-parental-advice I feel as if I have absolutely zero room to talk because I'm not a parent, but frankly speaking I probably spend more time with my 6th graders in a given school day than most parents spend with their kids in a given day. I don't expect, and I understand that not everyone carries all their emotions on their sleeve, is an open book like I usually am and feels relatively comfortable talking about most subjects, but it really baffles me to hear that many, not just one or two or five, but MANY of my 6th graders have never talked to their parents about health/sex-ed. Which, I think, leads to potentail unsafe means to learning about the topic.

Parents! Hello! Wake-up! Please talk to your child about sex-ed.

In the 6th grade, here are the topics discussed (keep in mind that these topics are also discussed with both genders in the classroom at the same time):

Good hygiene practices
Puberty (and all the changes that go along with it)
Female reproductive system
Male reproductive system
Conception, fertilization and the gestation process from 0-9 months
HIV/AIDS, communicable and non-communicable diseases
Emotional maturity vs. physical maturity
Overall health and well-being of your body, and what role this plays in the well-being of a mother and baby
...and a few other topics that aren't coming to mind right now.

Prior to teaching Health (which I am teaching to all 6th graders this year), I share with the students that what we talk about is bound to be embarrassing, but they will also have feelings of curiosity. Both of which are completely normal.

I also introduce the question box. As I teach, all students are given scratch paper where they can write questions down. I openly suggest that they write any and all questions down that they may have; however, it doesn't mean that I will be answering all of their questions (because I'm not allowed to). They also have to write their name on their questions. I do this for a couple of reasons, 1) If I can't answer a question aloud, then in private I let the student know that they need to redirect their question to their parents (or more likely an older sibling,cousin or other family member), and 2) this usually eliminates the jokesters in the class who will try to ask the most direct and dirty questions (wishful thinking on my part anyway). I do not share with the class the names on the questions, it is for my knowledge only. At the end of each lesson I collect all the scratch paper, even if it is blank and dump it into the question box. Then I proceed to pull questions out of the box, and if the subject matter is permissable for me to discuss then I will answer the question.

The first day the students are shy...well, the girls are anyway. However, after the first day the students become progressively braver.
.
.
.
.
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So, I had typed a huge list of questions that were asked by 6th graders, but then, honestly, some of the questions were making me feel uncomfortable....and, I feel it is inappropriate to share because my students have disclosed information (basically in confidence) because they feel safe in their classroom environment and are too embarrassed to ask aloud in front of the class so they write them down. I've already shared with my students whether or not (more "nots" than "whethers") if I can answer their questions and have directed them accordingly.

Please. Please. Please! Please talk to your kids about health, sex-ed, and communicable and non-communicable diseases.

There are potentially more posts to come regarding this topic...it's after 11:00 and I've got twenty-four 6th graders that I need to be ready for tomorrow morning.

Good night all.

Cutie-pa-tooties

2011-05-14T08:01:00.000-07:00

One of our first guests in our new house was this sweet, little thing.

Along with this hansome dude.

I miss our niece and nephew a lot and I'm very thankful for the time we got to spend with them.

Preoccupied

2011-05-14T07:50:00.000-07:00

My last post was April 19th.
I guess we've been preoccupied.
We've been a little busy with this...

We bought a house!

We love it!

(More pics to come soon.)

Day 3: Money, Money, Money.

2011-04-19T23:02:00.001-07:00

How do I spend my money?

Tell us then, what is your opinion? Is it right to pay taxes to Caesar or not? -Mathew 22-17

It's late and I'm ready for bed so this is going to be short and sweet...
...I spend my money on life.
This took a lot of thought acutally.
I've been staring at the computer screen for quite some time.
That's all I've got.
Where should I spend more of my God's money.
Probably on God.
Do I do that?
Not often enough.
What does this look like or mean?
Well, according to the bible I should tithe 10%.
THAT SEEMS LIKE A LOT!
What if I tithe 10% and then a charitable opportunity comes up and I give more...
...is this part of my 10%?
Now maybe I don't have to give as much next time.
I find tithing a full 10% is very difficult.
Honestly, I don't do it.
Why?
I'm selfish.
I want that money for myself.
Wait a second.
My money isn't really mine.
AAARRGH!
I'm going in circles.
I'm going to sleep on it.
Teacher speaking in me...good thing this isn't a test.
I think I just failed.

Good night.

Kirkland Lacrosse

2011-04-18T20:49:00.000-07:00

I feel like this is a record...two posts in one day. However, I really wanted to share this picture of three students with their 6th grade teacher. What I love about this picture is the smile on their faces. If only they knew how much it means to their teacher to get invited to their games...and then the teacher shows up (with husband in tow)...and then the boys forgot that they are on the field playing, but they are waving frantically to get their teacher's attention, approval and acceptance. That teacher adores her 6th graders and is beyond proud of them.

How fun it was for Chad and I to go to a 5th-6th Kirkland Lacrosse game this past Saturday. Thanks boys for inviting me and even though you lost, I saw how hard you played, your dedication and love for the sport. I am proud of you!

Day 2: How Do Miracles Happen?

2011-04-18T20:28:00.000-07:00

How do miracles happen?
When the disciples saw this, they were amazed. "How did the fig tree wither so quickly?" They asked.
-Mathew 21:20

This question is a lot tougher than yesterday's question. I find this ironic that this happens to be one of the questions that our pastor encouraged us to seek this week...Holy Week (for those of you that aren't Christians, that's a catchy phrase that means the week leading up to Easter). Ironic because I have recently been questioning this myself due to the challenges of not being able to get pregnant, a miracle within itself.

I have a round about way of getting to the point of this question so please bare with me. Chad and I have recently paired up with another couple dear to our hearts, David and Laurie Lischke, to co-lead a new life group at our church. We recently went to the Lischke's house for dinner to talk about where the heart of our life group has stemmed from and what that looks like in the form of people gathering together. As we were talking, I had jotted down a couple of questions on a sticky note, one of which was related to miracles. My main question was why have some people (presumably Christians) witnessed a miracle and I have not? Are those that witness a miracle have a stronger, maybe more connected relationship with Christ? Has He chosen them specifically to be witnesses to miracles and if He has, then why haven't I been chosen? Am I not spiritual enough? It's no secret that I'm not on the greatest terms with God right now, but really, why haven't I witnessed a miracle? Maybe it's as simple as, ask and I shall receive? Whoa, wait a minute, that scares me a little (or a lot).

On the flip side of this, let's say that I did witness a miracle. Honestly, would I believe it? I think about the crazy Christians on t.v. or churches that are extremely charismatic and perform miracles every day on their church stage in front of thousands...I don't think I'd buy it. However, if I try to picture what it might have been like when Jesus was walking the earth. There were villages where smaller, more intimate gatherings occurred. People were not out to prove anything or outdo one another. There wasn't millions of dollars supporting these so-called miracles, but rather poor and non-egotistical people (Of course egos and rich vs. poor existed back then, but I don't think it was to the extreme as it is today). Within these small villages and small crowds of people, more humbling experiences took place. I might believe it then.

How do miracles happen? Honestly, I don't know. Nor do I have an answer...sorry to those that were hoping I would reveal an "a-ha" moment for them. What I do know is what Christ did for me, is a miracle. The humiliation, torture and abuse that Christ went through to save me (and you) is a miracle. Why is this a miracle? This is a miracle because Christ was physically abused to the point of almost not looking human-like. I can't even begin to explain the magnitude of abuse. He died on the cross and rose from the dead three days later. The mere fact that someone can rise from the dead after what He went through...well, that my friends, is a miracle.

Again, how do miracles happen? I don't know. And then I think about the spectrum of miracles that could happen...someone rising from the dead compared to all my students turning in an assignment on time (now that would be a miracle). Do all miracles happen because Christ has performed the ultimate miracle? Maybe so. Maybe I need to be bold and ask God to open my heart to this subject and maybe even witness a miracle. Maybe.

Please contemplate today, how do miracles happen?

Who Is Jesus?

2011-04-17T22:03:00.000-07:00

Today our pastor challenged us to ask and think about daily questions throughout Holy Week. My first thought was, it's Holy Week? Then shortly after I thought how great it will be to have a daily subject to write and share about on my blog. I then went back to my original thought, it's Holy Week? I guess I had never heard that Christian "term" before (I feel like there are a lot of those). I should preface my week's writings with I'm not a professional and I haven't been a Christian for very long; therefore, what I share this week is purely from my heart.

The question of the day: Who is Jesus?

When Jesus entered Jerusalem, the whole city was stirred and asked, "who is this? The crowds answered, "This is Jesus, the prophet from nazareth in Galilee." -Mathew 21:10-11

Who is Jesus? This seems like a loaded question, but maybe I'm making it too difficult. Then I laugh a little when I picture Jesus to be this sandle-footed-white-robe-wearing-Fabio-wind-blown-hair guy. Honestly I'm not sure what Jesus physically looks like; however, I do know that Jesus is my Savior. He loves me know matter what. He protects me and guides me. He is a teacher, a prophet, and a healer. He is the son of God. Jesus is the truth.

I fear Jesus, and I think that's okay. Honestly, depending on how my life is going (or not going) I get angry with Jesus and I think this is okay too. I need to remember to praise Him more often...daily. My relationship with Christ is between Him and I. For a while now it's been one sided and I know Jesus is waiting. He is waiting for me to turn to him. His arms are open wide and He is calling to me, but I'm stubborn. I'm breaking down and He knows this. I'm thankful He is patient and understanding.

Ask yourself, who is Jesus? It may excite you, make you happy and/or down right scare you, but that's okay because He loves you.

Peace of Mind

2011-04-17T00:48:00.000-07:00

I've sat and tried to explain what the lyrics to this song mean to me, but I just can't. They lyrics can speak for themselves.

"Peace Of Mind"

Mindy Smith

I need peace of mind

And a hopeful heart

To lose this rage

And move out of the dark

I ain't looking for rainbows

Or shooting stars

Just some peace of mind

And a hopeful heart

I need a peace of mind

And a lullaby

Cause theres an angry voice

In my head tonight

Tellin' me to do things

That can't be right

I need peace of mind

And a lullaby

And a miracle

For this broken soul

A little miracle

For this broken soul

I need peace of mind

And gentle hand

As I try to change

The way I am

And God forgives me

When I can't

I need peace of mind

And a gentle hand

Or a miracle

For this broken soul

A little miracle

For this broken soul

I need peace of mind

And a hopeful heart

Happy Thoughts

2011-04-17T00:35:00.000-07:00

When I get upset, angry or maybe even disappointed with the world...or life...I should think happy thoughts. Happy thoughts like these...

...a loving husband,

great friends,

a wonderful family

and baseball season (even if my home town team is the M's).

There are many other things

that make me happy,

but for now

I will stick with these.

Online Reading Journals...and Maybe A Small Rant

2011-04-05T22:33:00.000-07:00

I love seeing how my students respond to what they are reading. Whether it be a novel I am reading aloud in class or something of their choice, I thoroughly enjoy hearing their opinions, and more or less, innocent views of our world. I used to carry stacks of reading journals (lab notebooks, the kind without spirals) to and from home and respond to my students' journal entries. However, I couldn't keep up...I didn't feel like I could constructively respond to their reflections to what they were reading and I think this is very important. I also had students that were losing their journals, leaving them behind at school at not being able to complete their refelction or forgetting them at home. It became a journal-loose-leaf-paper-mess!

So, I brainstormed...A LOT...and tried to come up with a way that I could eliminate the journals (honestly, they get heavy and annoying after a while) and possibly get my students to be more active in completing their assignments in a timely manner. I finally came up with an idea...I started an online journal for my class. There are so many resources out there for teachers (thank you Internet) and I came across this site called KidBlog.org. It is specifically designed for the safety of student-teacher-classroom use and it's free (big plus in my book). Each of my students has a personal login and password, one in which I set and cannot be changed. I post questions to the KidBlog and they respond either in the comments or in a separate post under their own page. My students have also been able to respond to their peers' posts. I absolutely love it!

We've been using our KidBlog for the past couple of months and my eyes have been opened to a whole new world. I'm excited to report that many of my students are more likely to complete their homework because they don't have to take anything home with them and they get to do it on the computer. My students are "plugged in" to the max and I just had to find a way to tap into that resource. The other eye opener is the consistency, or rather lack their of, of families who do not have a set schedule for the students when it comes to completing homework. I'm absolutely baffled. Having a conducive study location and set time for students to work on their homework in a routine matter actually makes quite a bit of difference in student success. Kids love routine!

Growing up we had strict rules, which back then I wasn't all that fond of, but now I am extremely thankful for the guidelines that were set in our house. One of the rules I can remember is that within a given season we were allowed to participate in only one extra-curricular activity (Thank you, Mom and Eric, so much for this rule.) We also had to have our homework completed before we could do anything else. My students are rushed from one activity to the next, eating dinner in the car and not getting to their homework until 9, 10, 11:00 at night. Really? It's no wonder my students come in acting like zombies or extremely off their rocker and then crash by 2:00. How are my students supposed to focus, pay attention and excell in school when they aren't getting a good nights sleep and their life is a constant race? AND where is the family time? My guess is that family time is on the way from one event to the next in the mini-van/SUV with a TV. Quite frankly, I probably don't have a lot of room to talk because I don't have a family...I'm just the teacher who spends the most quality time with your kid; your child that I absolutely adore and want more than anything for them to achieve to the highest that they possibly can.

I thought my plate was full...I'm an adult and I don't have that much to worry about. Well, a little bit, but not much. My students are only 11 and 12 years old. They have 10-times the amount of chaos, craziness and worries in their lives. It's unfair, it truly is unfair. I can only hope that I can be that solid consistency in my students' lives...that is until they move onto the next grade.

Being a teacher, one that cares, is the toughest job I have ever had to do.

I'm tired...it's 10:30...this teacher needs to get to bed.

Good night,
Mrs. MacDonald

Perfect Day

2011-04-01T10:35:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite things to do is walk around downtown Seattle with a cup of something warm to drink in hand (usually a chai latte) and just enjoy the life that surrounds me. More often than not I have destinations in mind and a particular routine takes place and I guess I didn't realize this until more recently. I used to share this routine with my friend Anna, but she no longer lives in Seattle (I miss her dearly).

The routine starts off by finding parking. I wish I knew of a great "secret" place to park that didn't cost a fortune, but I have yet to find that spot. So, I usually find myself parking in the Pacific Place garage because I feel safe...and it's part of the routine. Upon leaving Pacific Place through the main mall entrance, I am welcomed to the hustle and bustle of a small-town-big-city. Hello, Seattle! Next stop, closest Starbucks, which happens to be on Pine and 6th right across the street. Once my warm drink is in hand I venture to the Gap, where I really can't afford anything, but if I find a hat, scarf, tights or socks on sale then I might purchase them. After "ooing" and "aweing" over what I would like to wear I venture next door to Old Navy. Definitely more appealing to my wallet, but I'm not always in the mood to have to dig through piles of clothing and sales racks. I then mosey down a block and around the corner to Anthropologie. I love going into this store purely to dream. Wishful thinking is all that comes from Anthropologie because it is definitely out of my league for my wallet. I love the unique display of items, the smell of their candles burning and the feeling I get...almost as if I am in another country. I definitely enjoy the dreaming that I endeavor in Anthropologie.

I do enjoy the shopping, or rather looking, but what I really enjoy is my next destination, Pike's Place Market. I can spend hours down at the market taking in the smells, watching the people interact, listening to the street performers, and seeing life happen all around me.

This is Kathy, a friend from St. John/Westport.

We shared market experiences together this past week.

In the market, off to the left of the FISH guys is a treasure called Market Spice. This store has an abundance of teas and spices to purchase from bulk. In the back of the store there is always a warm pot of tea brewing and samples are available. By now my coffee is gone and the comfort smell of Market Spice tea is the perfect treat...especially on a rainy Seattle day.

Hello Market Spice.

A purchase from Market Spice doesn't happen to often, but when it does it's always a toss up between the huckleberry and original Market Spice teas.

If my trip into Pike's Place is earlier in the morning then I will visit my next favorite spot, the Doughnut Company. There is something about this smell that brings back childhood memories and I couldn't figure it out until Chad mentioned something to me the other day, the doughnut machine at Wild Waters. (Side story) When I was younger there were a couple of summers where we had a pass to Wild Waters, a water slide park in Coeurd'Alene, Idaho. At the water park there was a similar doughnut machine as the one at Pike's Place Market. Instead of buying lunch, Rolan and I would put our money together and buy these mini doughnuts. I can't recall how often we would buy and eat doughnuts for lunch, but I don't think it was too often because we didn't always have the money. I don't think the doughnuts in the market are the same, but the smell is identical. It's a sweet-bakery-greasy aroma and makes my stomach crave the doughnuts whenever I walk out of the Market Spice and down the side hall to the Doughnut Company location. A couple of days ago was no exception and without question I stood in line, as there is always a line (That's a good sign, right?), and waited patiently for my hot, freshly made, 6 plain mini doughnuts.

Mmmm...mini doughnuts.

If you look closely you can see in the window a tier of doughnuts. The top tier has sprinkled, and cinnamon and sugar doughnuts, the middle has powdered doughnuts and the bottom has the plain doughnuts. I should've taken a picture of the doughnut machine next to the tier of doughnuts...I guess I'll just have to go back.

With my sack of mini doughnuts in hand, which I should also say that six mini doughnuts is enough for 2-3 people because they are so greasy and rich, I will then venture through the remainder of the market and often, get to the end, turn around and walk back through. The flowers, the colors, the fresh fruit and vegetable samples, the street performers, the funny fishermen, the tourists, the locals, the crafts, the almond samples, the crazy people, the view of the water, the history...I love it all.

Alas, I have taken in all that I can, or am becoming concerned about the hefty parking bill awaiting me, and will head back towards the car...

What a perfect day.

Three

2011-03-30T16:46:00.000-07:00

There are three little ones that can always make me smile...no matter what. I love all kids, but these three absolutely melt my heart and I love every minute I get to spend with them.

He is silly.

She's down right adorable and the greatest cuddle bug.

And this is Liam. He's sensitive.

I can't explain the love I have for him...

...really all three of them,

but this one...(sigh)...he seriously melts my heart.

These pictures were taken on Monday, the first day of Spring Break. I'm almost certain I started last year's Spring Break with a similar lunch date. I love you Aidan, Gia and Liam.

Fam Visit

2011-03-30T16:20:00.001-07:00

My family came to visit and mom spent the day in my classroom. Justin and Eric stopped by later in the day for lunch. What a treat, not only for me, but for my students. My students heard stories from when I was in elementary school and they LOVED it. I enjoyed "showing off" my family to everyone.

Listography

2011-03-14T16:12:00.001-07:00

I'm often looking for ways to get my students to write without it feeling like a chore. I want students to express themselves in their writing, provide detail and really let their readers imagine what they are writing about. I want to feel what my students are feeling as I read their writing. Without question, I also want them to work on their conventions (spelling, capitalization, and punctuation), but then I find them getting hung-up on their conventions and not focusing on the actual content of their writing; the part I find more meaningful.

While on my weekend jaunt to Widbey Island, I picked up this little treasure.

My immediate thought was how fun this would be to share with my students and how it might trigger ideas for their writing....or ideas for teaching.

On the ferry ride home I pulled out my new purchase and began filling it in. Here is my first list.

Places I've Lived:
Lompoc, California
Coeur d'Alene, Idaho
Pinehurst, Idaho
Moscow, Idaho
Quito, Ecuador
Bothell, Washington
Kirkland, Washington

Fun! I've got to remember to take this to school and share with my kids. They are going to love this!

For the Love of 6th Grade

2011-03-12T19:26:00.000-08:00

All I have to say is that our conversations in class this past Friday ranged from...

1. Pi is cool because it's like "pie".
2. How cool it would be to live in Antarctica, or maybe just take a field trip as a class. (This would be rad!...We are studying Earnest Shackleton.)
3. Whoopie cushions make funny noises.
4. Some familes don't openly talk about farting and burping and we need to respect that. (So, in other words, only have the whoopie cushion out during appropriate times and not when I'm teaching.)
5. How can we help the children in need from the tsunami in Japan? We have so much to be thankful for.
6. Marvel comics are awesome.
7. Who is reading the coolest book in class right now? (The winner was a toss up between The Chronicles of Narnia, When You Reach Me and My 6th Grade Teacher is an Alien...awesome!)
8. Greek Root of the Week: logos, meaning word and of course scatology (the study of feces) was one of the discovered words...yes, I accepted it, but they could not do a skit on that particular word.
9. What is a haiku poem? My class is full of beautiful poets! (They truly are, but I might be a little bias too.)
10. The mystery of when Mrs. MacDonald's birthday is and how old she is going to be. (They finally figured it out...and were shocked when they realized I'm as old as some of their parents.)

My love for 6th grade is endless and my heart just melts thinking about how adorable my class is.

Hidden Treasure

2011-03-09T18:32:00.000-08:00

I found myself venturing to Whidbey Island this past weekend with a group of girlfriends. What a hidden treasure our little destination was...and I'm not going to tell you where for fear of others fleeing to this magnificent gem. I could live there. Quiet. Calm. Serene. And there was coffee. Really good coffee. There is even beachfront for running. All this place needs is an Irish Pub and I'd have one foot out the door, but only if Chad was with me.

Surrounded

2011-03-02T09:27:00.000-08:00

Today I'm home sick. Maybe this is a good thing because the time to myself allows time for thinking and time with God. It's not a hidden secret that my heart has been hurting and hurting a lot, and lately I've had a lot of questions. Most of my questions have started with "Why?". And many of my questions I don't have answers to and I may never get answers. I'm trying to be okay with that, but it's really hard.

God knows my heart and he knows I've been struggling. He knows that I'm hurting and in pain. He also knows that I need others to support me and surround me with His love. He's done just that. In my bouts of anger with God I've felt aslmost as if he has turned His back on me. Although logically I know this is not true. God will never turn his back on me...and again more "why" questions scramble through my head. My God is a God of love...again more "whys"...and as He carries me through this time of hardship, hurting and pain, I think on the other side it's going to be okay.

I'm thankful for the family and friends that God has surrounded me with; family and friends who love Him and love me.

Thank you.

Greatest Strength

2011-02-21T11:00:00.000-08:00

(Warning: sporadic and emotional post that is all over the place.)

One of my favorite things to do is lay in bed at night and have deep and meaningful conversations with Chad. Last night was no exception. I've had a heavy heart for the past...well...3-4 years, but more recently those feelings have been stronger; my heart has been aching, confused and just down right pissed off.

In our conversation last night, Chad shared with me that often great leaders' strength(s) is (are) also their greatness weakness(es). I'm no great leader, but he continued to share that I have a big heart and this is my greatest strength, but at the same time my greatest weakness. I question, how could something so good, also be bad? It doesn't make sense, but it's true. My heart is huge and I care tremendously for the people in my life and just life occurrences themselves. I care so much that it is difficult for me to let things go, put them behind me and move on.

Let me back up and share that this conversation came about because of my presence at a church leader meeting. I really had no desire to go, but I am a newer life group leader and felt like I needed to. I've never looked at myself as being a "church leader", but for some reason I was drawn to last night's gathering. I had very little to share and sat at the meeting trying to hold back tears as I listened to the conversation about where our church has been, where it is right now and where we are going from here. Good and bad things were shared, and definitely in a positive manner of speaking.

At the end of this intimate, small group gathering, the pastor asked one final question, "How are you doing?" Personally, I thought, how am I doing? Are you kidding me? I'm not good. Ironically, I'm sitting at a church leader meeting, my heart is stone cold and I hate God. Wow.

It was my turn to share. Through tears and anger, and yet maybe a little hope, I looked directly at the pastor and told him that for the past 6 months I've wanted to leave the church, and that I was tired of bitching about it so here I sit, at a church leader meeting hating God because of life circumstances...AND...I'm a life group leader. I don't understand. My poor pastor and the remainder of the group sat in complete silence and maybe shocked to see this person who, for the most part, always has a smile on her face and is in good spirits on the outside, just crumble.

My reason for being there...I need their support. They're going into a spiritual battle for me because my heart is too weak to fight right now. I'm confused with how my loving God could be withholding from me something I want so badly...a family. How could my loving God take 3 babies from me? I am really struggling with this and I just don't understand. I think we would make excellent parents...does God not see this?

Through tears I type...wanting a family, trying to understand my loving God and praying that my love for Jesus can be regained.

A Few of My Favorite Things

2011-02-18T21:37:00.000-08:00

I've done this before, but I thought I would do it again mainly because it reminds me of how grateful I should be for everything in my life. So here goes...a few of my favorite things (in no particular order, except for the first two).

1. Chad...there aren't words to describe how blessed I am for my loving husband
2. my family...I wish we could see them more often
3. my friends....they mean the world to me
4. sunshine
5. hot cocoa with overflowing mini-marshmallows...and then a second heaping handful after they have melted or been eaten off the top
6. camping
7. cooking over the campfire...I'm not talking about roasting hot dogs
8. teaching from the heart
9. laughter coming from little kids
10. running
11. knitting
12. watching documentary films
13. watching foreign films
14. cuddling with Gia
15. laughing with Liam
16. watching Monsters with Aidan
17. walking through downtown Seattle
18. shopping...but finding a good deal, not just shopping
19. University of Idaho
20. reminiscing about Tri Delta...I miss the girls, the craziness, the chaos and the drama from my sorority
21. I love 6th grade innocent, yet not so innocent sense of humor...they are adorable
22 I enjoy 6th grade student loyalty to their teacher...sorry to all the substitute teachers out there, but 6th grade students are so loyal to their teacher...they just don't want anyone to realize that
23. floating the north fork of the Coeurd'Alene river
24. going on boat rides with Chad's family
25 peanut cruises
26. walking through open air markets or farmer's markets
27. scrapbooking...although I don't do it all that often anymore
28. road trips
29. traveling
30. experiencing different cultures
40. food...I love food from other cultures/countries
41. chocolate...I have a HUGE sweet tooth
42. banana and almont butter
43. mangos....mango everything actually
44. fresh orange juice...I can't drink any other kind
45. lemonade
46. playing scrabble...I have a deluxe edition...it's sweet
47. dancing salsa and merengue...although I'm not very good
48. dark beer...especially oatmeal stouts....my favorite is Boundary Bay's Oatmeal Stout
49. girl time...I have multiple smaller circles of girlfriends and I enjoy the time spent with them
50. warm weather...80 degrees or warmer
51. SURVIVOR...it's kind of crazy actually
52. running on the beach at Fort Flagler
53. Bloomsday
54. purses/bags
55. hats
56. scarves
57. shoes
58. summer bbq's
59. Mariner baseball...especially opening day
60. four-wheeling
61. archery
62. the band Clumsy Lovers...or other music similar to this
63. hiking
64. tootsie rolls
65. Camp Four Echoes
66. the feeling of new running socks on my feet
67. Spanish language
68. fairs
69. cows...I want a pet cow like Norman from City Slickers
70. Great Danes....they're kind of like cows
71. warm colors....reds, greens browns
72. Shel Silverstein
73. Roald Dahl
74. social networking....okay, really it's Facebooking
75. blackberry picking
76. sitting curbside at parades
77. firework displays
78. camping on the beach
79. trivia
80. cafe con leche...from guatemala...it's not the same here
81. taking pictures...although I'm not the best at it...I just enjoy documenting my life and experiences
82. Chad's sense of humor, patience and hard working determination
83. wine tasting
84. working on the Daily and New York Times crossword with Chad
85. watching Jeopardy
86. coffee dates with Chad
87. Irish pubs
88. tea....all kinds really....well, except for earl grey
89. playing horse shoes
90. scalding hot showers...to the point of my skin turning pink
91. making earings
92. canoeing
93. cute little Girl Scouts selling cookies
94. Girl Scout cookies
95. my Mizuno running shoes
96. HUGS...I'm a hugger and I try to be considerate of others' "bubbles", but it's also fun to pop their bubbles
97. potty talk
98. the way Chad looks at me and smiles when he talks about me
99. Chad's dimples
100. any kind of baby animal...anything in baby form is so incredibly cute

Okay, so my favorites started as a few ideas and then about number 40-something I thought I should continue to 100. The materialistic items on my list are great, but what I really enjoy are the relationships I share with all the people in my life.

I'm grateful today. I need to remember this everyday.

I Am Loved

2011-02-17T16:53:00.001-08:00

When he looks at me

I smile and

My heart melts.

I am so blessed.

I love him.

He loves me

With all his heart.

Kennedy School, Portland, Oregon

(Thanks Molly for snapping this picture of the two of us).

Technology Tool

2011-02-16T15:28:00.000-08:00

Our technology issues started a couple months ago and after being in and out of "the shop" 3 times, we finally said good-bye to our laptop. I've been without the technology tool to keep up with my blogging and store my pictures and it's been driving me nuts. Possibly a rhetorical question, but honestly, what did I do prior to my laptop? How did I keep up with the world (thank you Facebook)? Store my pictures?...

So, here I sit at work longing for my laptop, and instead of using my teacher time wisely I am blogging (about nothing really)...and downloading pictures...I want to share with others through my pictures what has been going on in my life. It's hard to share when I don't have a place to store my pictures.

I have hopes of getting a new laptop...hopefully soon. Until then, my school computer will have to do.

I want to...

2011-02-02T21:04:00.000-08:00

...go here.

Or here.

This would do too.

And I want to see this. I'm not even a soccer fan, but this would be fun.

How great it would be to go dance where they are dancing.

I want to stroll down this street.

A day hike here would be marvelous.

How tasty it would be to eat this...

...and ALL these fresh fruits.

Lucky for me, all of this is one location.

Spain.

Now all I've go to do is figure out how WE can get there.

Trail of Thoughts

2011-01-23T21:19:00.000-08:00

The worship, prayer, and message got to me today.

I cried and wanted to cry more, but I held back.

I need to let it go.

I need a change of heart.

God needs to be the focus of my life.

That's a good place to start, I guess.

I 've got to trust in God.

I must realize that everything happens when He thinks it's right.

I'm not in charge of time.

I need to spend tme with God daily.

This should change my heart.

I need to have hope.

God can give me that hope.

I can't turn my back on God anymore.

Trust is important.

Hurting, Hopeful Heart

2011-01-20T22:44:00.000-08:00

I know I need to move on and I realize it is no longer Christmas, but certain events prior to the holidays have stirred up my current spiritual thoughts and maybe struggles. I was invited, along with a few other friends, to a Christmas performance at Northshore Baptist Church. I had absolutely zero hesitation in going to this event due to a few reasons: 1) I enjoy any kind of Christmas show, 2) I was invited by a dear friend, and 3) the additional company and plans for the evening sounded superb. And as predicted, the night turned out to be filled with great food, fun, and entertainment. However, what I did not expect was the heartache and empty feeling in my heart as I got in my care and drove home, tears streaming down my face.

Since that evening I have continued to question why I felt the way I did. Why the feeling of heartache, lonliness and almost as if something is/was missing continues to linger in my heart? I'm questioning on whether or not I am getting spiritually fulfilled? Am I going to church for the right reasons? Is it time for a change?...The questions continue to build up and I have yet to have any answers. I know a good place to start is asking God and praying about it, but this is an entirely different challenge in my life right now as well. I'm fairly certain I know why the emotional feelings consumed me the evening I drove away from Northshore Baptist Church, but the truth I fear.

The truth: Chad and I have been going to the Rock Church ever since we moved to the Seattle area. After a few weekends of "church shopping", we finally found a church that welcomed us with open arms, did not have an average age of 90 and was not preparing over-the-top miracles in front of a few thousand people. Within weeks we knew we had found a new home. We've been in multiple life groups, volunteered and have established life-lasting relationships with many members of our church. The truth, I think it's time for a change. My heart is beating twice the normal speed just thinking about a change. What does this look like? What is going to happen? Where will we end up? What relationships will continue and who will slowly trickle out of our every day lives? And when is this going to happen? The change may take place at our current church or the change may take place elsewhere. The truth scares me.

I suppose, the first and foremost step in getting past my fears is re-establishing my relationship with Jesus. I know I've turned away from Him due to life events that I have had no control over nor do I have answers as to why God has taken me down this path. What I do know is I have a loving God who is always there for me...that's where I will start....my heart is hopeful.

What Happened to December?

2011-01-17T18:17:00.000-08:00

When I should be finalzing report cards and preparing for conferences, I find myself catching up on my blog. I still have a few days...I can procrastinate a few more hours, right?
It's mid-January. MID-JANUARY! What happened to December and the beginning of January?

Over the holidays we spent some time in northern Idaho and Spokane. I always feel rushed to see as many family and friends as we can whenever we go home for the holidays, but this year I didn't. We made a simple plan and stuck to it...sorry to those that we did not see this past trip to the east side. We'll see you next time.

We were up at my Dad's house for Christmas this year and I absolutely love going up there. I think it's the feeling of being completely disconnected, the silence of nature all around (my dad calls it God's country...it's simply beautiful) and the overall relaxing environment. Not to mention that driving up the river always elevates fond childhood memories from deep within. We spent many hours basking in each other's company, sharing stories and just being silly. A feeling of happiness consumes my entire body just thinking about it.

We snuck in a day with Chad's family and I'm so thankful to have such a loving family. It just so happened to work out for all of us to come home for Christmas...or rather the day after. With Kurt and Teags in Eugene, Kael and Jason in Cheney and Chad and I in Kirkland our individual lives get busy. Although, when we do get to see one another it's always that much more special.

Here are a few pics from Christmas...

Dad and I.

Dad, Chad and I. I love self-taken photos.

Debbie in her cute apron.

Dad's wild turkeys...he feeds about 50 of them.

This is right out their back door.

At the MacDonald's...

Reese (also known as the cutest niece in the world) sitting at her new table.

The boys playing with the loader...a tradition.

The Colemanator (most hansome nephew in the world) proudly displaying his new Idaho Vandal hat.

I must apologize to Chad and Teags for posting this, but I couldnt' resist sharing.

A tradition at the MacDonald's...you have to try on EVERYTHING!

Of course, without question, Chad and Teags did not pass up this opportunity to model their new unders...

...and it digressed from here.

Therefore, I will not show you the other pictures which are not suitable for everyone's eyes.

A quick stop to see my brother....

I miss him...a lot.

I'm done with sharing for now...

Tip-Toeing Topics

2011-01-17T16:55:00.000-08:00

I love the holidays, all holidays. I think this feeling comes from my childhood and the excitement of every holiday around our house. Mom always had something prepared to read to us, give to us, or some crafty project for us to create. Thanks, mom...those happy memories mean a lot to me.

The happy feeling of Christmas is one of my favorite times of year. I know, I know...it's mid-January and I'm writing about Christmas, but I truly do love the feeling of warmth, love and happiness everywhere. I even enjoy the crowded malls, the hustle and bustle and the mass marketing of the season that begins before Halloween has arrived. The one thing I do not enjoy is the tip-toeing around everyone's feelings, customs and traditions about what the holiday season is all about.

As a teacher, I really struggle with the sensitive topics and what I should and shouldn't teach. I'm not only talking about Christmas either. There are many schools across the nation that no longer celebrate Halloween or St. Valentine's Day. Really? I honestly don't have anything profound to say about this topic, but I do know that I don't shy away from talking, teaching and providing an opportunity for classroom discussion on most holidays, traditions, customs and beliefs that are shared around our world. I find it incredibly valuable to have these student-led conversations because it provides an opportunity for creating community and establishing relationships in my classroom. After all, isn't a classroom supposed to provide that safe environment for students? A place where they can openly discuss, ask questions and develop their own opinions on wordly views sounds like an ideal classroom to me.

As a 6th grade teacher I feel comfortable and confident in what I teach and what I do not shy away from when it comes to tip-toeing topics.

With that being said...Happy Halloween, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and Happy Valentine's Day.

Writing With No Time

2011-01-10T17:00:00.000-08:00

I don't like that I don't have time to blog anymore...at least I feel like I don't have as much time to blog. Not to mention our computer has been on the fritz for the past month and blogging at work isn't something I enjoy. Nonetheless, here I sit, blogging at work...I would really just like to go home now.
I have a lot to catch up on and I have a lot I want to write about. I also like making lists so I can check things off as they are completed. So, here is a list of things that I would like to write about...

1. Tip-toeing around holiday discussions/celebrations/teachings in the classroom.
2. Christmas Vacation
3. Current spiritual struggles
4. Reflections on teaching and my students
5. Running and where I am right now
6. My favorite breakfast recipe
7. House hunting
8. Knitting hats
9. ...I can't think of anything else

This is a good start. Now because I'm tired and I want to go home, my posts will have to wait until tomorrow. Until then, enjoy this picture...

...it's supposed to snow this week and this is what our street looked like the last time it snowed. Pretty.

Christmas Traditions

2010-12-14T17:27:00.000-08:00

Today in class I showed a video on how Christmas is celebrated around the world. I know, I know...you're probably thinking, "What? How can she get away with that at school?" (Which is an entire separate post in itself...I won't go there now.) Well, this particular video featured celebrations of families from Scandanavia, Native America, South Korea, Mexico and Ethiopia. Beings that a variety of cultures were being displayed, I felt confident in the safety of showing this video (Again, more feelings about this in a separate post!)

HOWEVER, my favorite part of this particular class time was the student led discussion after showing the video. I began the conversation with the question, "What Christmas or holiday traditions does your family celebrate around this time of year?" This led to a very excited class sharing and innocently boasting about their family traditions...I absolutely loved every minute of it!

There were many traditions shared from when to open presents to where "eves" versus "days" are celebrated to what is baked, cooked and eaten. It was fantastic! I took note on a couple of the traditions shared by my students. Here are my favorites:

1. A stocking Advent calendar: There are 25 small stockings (I picture the little tiny stockings about the size of a deck of cards) hanging from a piece of twine (very traditional). Each stocking is numbered and each stocking has a little gift inside. Like most advent calendars, a countdown takes place and each day a gift is removed from a stocking. Love, love, LOVE this idea and I want to make my own! Where do Advent calendars originate from anyways?
2. Secret Santa or gift exchange (drawing of names) within the family. This is WAY better then buying a gift for everyone. Why do we by the gifts anyway? There seems to be better reasons to be celebrating this time of year, don't you think?
3. One gift is opened Christmas Eve which happens to be "family pajamas". Everyone in the family gets similar printed Christmas pajamas. Sounds kind of cheesy, but I love this idea.
4. A family sporting event...football, sledding races, snowman building competitions, gingerbread house competitions....they went on and on and on. What a fun idea!

My family traditions...well, that's yet another post.
Enjoy the Christmas season everyone!

Snails

2010-12-02T10:55:00.000-08:00

I have a student in my class that is unique...very unique. And his little quirks make me love him even more...he is hilarious, entertaining and extremely intelligent...but unique. He is obsessed with snails. Fresh water snails. NOT salt water snails, as I have been informed many times that there is a HUGE difference.

At the beginning of the year I was asked by this student if he could bring in one of his fresh water tanks for the class. My first thought was, "What a mess!" Then I thought about it more and if a fresh water tank was going to let this student focus on school work and stay "centered" in my classroom then, "Why not?"

Many more conversations arose between this student and myself and as I listened to him talk about, in great detail, the fish and snails (again, with another reminder that they were fresh water animals) that he cares for at home I was very intrigued by the knowledge he was sharing.

So, we came to a comprimise. He could bring in 4 freshwater snails in a small tank that wasn't any bigger than a gallon of milk.

The very next morning, skipping with joy and excitment, I had a mason jar sitting on my desk with 4 fresh water snails. Disgusting. However, they are closely monitored and cared for by this student. Not to mention all the other students' enthusiasm about these snails have grown immensly.

I've been looking at these snails for the past 8 weeks and the other day I noticed something different about them. There appeared to be more....A LOT MORE!

We have baby snails! They are cute and fun to watch. We have new life. We have science. We've had outstanding teaching moments.

I now LOVE the snails.

Rainy Day Recess

2010-11-30T12:57:00.001-08:00

There's nothing fun about it. The kids are trapped inside, I'm trapped inside (WITH THEM) and it makes for a long day. Rest assured I still love my class dearly, but when they are 12, excited for our 6th grade trip, 12, eager for winter break, 12, overstressed with assessments, 12....THEY NEED THEIR RECESS. Maybe I just need them to have their recess.

I live in an area where it rains. It rains a lot during the winter months. It's not necessarily that cold, but it rains. (I don't necessarily care for the rain.) When it rains too much the kids can't go outside or they can't play in certain areas of the playground because it's too muddy. Seriously, it baffles me that engineers, architechts, contractors (whomever plays a role in building a school) doesn't take the weather into consideration. A play area that can be sheltered from rain, that won't cause a muddy mess and that can cover a significant amount of students should be considered when building a school in western Washington.

Although, my kids ARE quietly working (on a writing assessment) as I blog about the rainy day.

She's One of My Favorites

2010-11-11T15:37:00.001-08:00

I'm a lucky girl. Beyond having a great husband, a job I enjoy going to every day and good health...I also have some amazing girlfriends in my life. I have girlfriends that I work out with, girlfriends I teach with, girlfriends who I drink with, girlfriends I share the Lord with and girlfriends who I share life with. Throughout my life I have always been blessed with being surrounded by wonderful women. I think about the women that have drifted in and out of my life and at any one particular moment in my life she (or they) mean the world to me.

This moment of my life I have one friend that I have a special connection with. One that, I know, we will be friends forever. We have shared our inner most fears with one another and been there for each other through trying times. Times in our lives that I know if we didn't have each other we would question, "How did we make it through that time in our life without each other."

I thank God for placing this funny, caring, adventerous, honest, matter-of-fact, sincere, trusting and loving friend, Molly, in my life....because she is one of my favorites.

Love you, Molly.

Coffee and a Correcting Pen

2010-11-09T13:52:00.000-08:00

I think I've found my new morning routine.

Although I can't afford for it to happen every day.

I was at Starbucks this morning by 6:45

Where I sat quietly,

Next to a warm fire,

In my cute teacher outfit (goes with the job I guess),

Sipping on a peppermint mocha,

Correcting papers.

This made me happy

For the rest of my day.

Bottle It Up

2010-11-08T20:01:00.001-08:00

Today I was told I was the best teacher EVER! That's big. That's huge! That feels awesome. Now if only I can figure out how to bottle up this tremendous feeling I feel in my heart right now, save it, and open the bottle later as a little reminder when the tough, tiring and trying times come through my classroom.

Once again, I love my class.

The Hallo-Wiener

2010-11-07T18:04:00.001-08:00

Preface to a story:
One of my favorite Halloween picture books is called The Hallo-Wiener. This book is about a wiener dog named Oscar who always gets picked on by the other dogs because of his size and he even gets picked on by the cats too (this is the worst). For Halloween his mom buys him a costume, a hot dog bun costume, and Oscar doesn't want to wear the costume, but he also doesn't want to hurt his mom's feelings...so he wears the costume. Of course, all the other dogs make fun of him. All the dogs go trick-or-treating together and Oscar can't keep up because his legs are so short and his costume keeps getting in the way. The other dogs get spooked by a "ghost" and Oscar comes to the rescue by pulling the bottom of the costume off of...the cats! In the end the other dogs realize that Oscar's size is important and that he is actually a really nice dog.

Story:
The Friday before Halloween I shared with my students my favorite Halloween book, The Hallo-Wiener. The kids had heard of the book and many of them had had the book read to them when they were younger, but I read it to them anyway. As I was reading the book, they would laugh at the jokes the author incorporated into the story (there is a play on words that revolve around hot dogs). One of my students even said, "I never got all the jokes until now."

When I finished the story the kids all "awed" and commented on how cute the story was. I had them think about how this story could be related to the personal narratives that they were writing themselves. I then asked them to think about what the "lesson learned" was or the moral of the story that the author was trying to get across.

One serious student, sitting towards the back of the classroom, quickly raised his hand and without thinking said, "Don't judge a person by their wiener."

Instantly the class was in an uproar and I about fell off my stool I was sitting on from laughing myself. Other students commented to this young boy, "Do you realize what you just said?"

As he sat there for a second and the classroom continued to be filled with student laughter, the boy finally realized what he had said and smiled himself. He then said somewhat sheepishly, "Well, you know what I mean."

There's never a dull moment when teaching 6th grade.

Just Can't Do It...and Other Random Thoughts (My Students)

2010-10-26T22:03:00.000-07:00

So, I've tried having various pages with different topics, but I don't like the idea of having static pages. I just can't do it. My viewers can't comment on one specific post. So, I'm going to try something new...I'm working on figuring out tags, labels or something like that. I will have a few...running, knitting, love, school...I'm not quite sure what else....and I've got to figure out how to show or post my tags (How do I do this, Erin? You have so many and I like this!)

Until the "tagging" begins...life has been good and getting back to normal. Whatever "normal" may be. I continue to turn to my students (I should probably focus more on God, but it's been challenging lately...I'm okay with that and I think He understands right now)...

I can't share enough how amazing my students are. There is something special about each and every one of them (and they have completely stolen my heart). Something that I can't explain, but I fall asleep every night thinking of them, praying for them, and thanking God every day for them (okay, so I haven't completely turned my back on Him). I only wish I could share more pictures and videos of what actually happens in my classroom. It's unfortunate that our world is so creepy and unsafe for my innocent and absolutely outsanding students...so unsafe that I can't post an incredible video of them having a blast and leading an all school "wave" at our Fun Run...or them being incredible role models to their 2nd grade Little Buddies and taking the time to share their favorite picture books...or (the smaller things in the classroom that make me happy) coming in quietly from recess and following the directions on the board, transitioning to the next subject without me saying a word, OR getting a 5 in music (the best) and being told on the way back to their classroom that they are the best class that Ms. Osbourne has had in a while...

...SERIOUSLY? Thank you my outstanding 6th graders. I look forward to my day, every day, because of you. (My heart is smiling with warm, fuzzy happiness right now.)

Blogger Questions

2010-10-18T18:18:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to figure out how to create separate posts within my different pages, but I don't think it is possible. BLOGGER do something about this! I don't know "code", "html" or any other special lingo to be able to do this, but I want to have this feature on my blog. I guess my added pages are "static". Again, I'm not quite sure what this means in the world of blogging, but for me right now it means I can't create on my blog what I would like to.

Therefore, until Blogger or someone else can help me with this (I'm tired of searching the internet for the answer), please look at my other pages as I am going to update them with additional information or my own version of creating a new post on the page. I've separated the new posts by the date of when they were created.

Happy blogging everyone...and now I must go figure out html....or maybe not.

Beach Run

2010-10-18T09:33:00.007-07:00

A recent weekend get-away with friends was much needed. I packed running clothes...just in case. Less than a half an hour after arriving at our destination I went for a run. My new favorite place to run...along the bluff and on the beach of Fort Flagler State Park. I MUST find a similar place near Kirkland where I can get lost in my run. Somewhere where I do not listen to my music, but rather get lost in the sounds of water lapping against the shore, a slight breeze blowing in the trees, and mama birds waking up their babies for breakfast. Thanks for the beautiful runs, Fort Flagler.

Running Thoughts

2010-10-05T22:16:00.000-07:00

I'm not a runner, although I enjoy running.

I don't run as often as I would like to (or maybe should).

I like feeling free.

I don't have a runner's physique.

I wish I had a runner's body.

Running gets my emotions out...and away.

Running is my escape.

I need to run more often.

Not to escape, but to listen.

Listen to my own thoughts.

Then again maybe I run to escape my own thoughts.

My music let's me escape.

I'm going to run for myself, for my health.

I've ran a half marathon...twice.

I should get my strength back to where I was.

A 10K sounds doable right now...or maybe in 8 weeks.

I should just go run.

I'll start that tomorrow morning.

I'll get back to you and let you know how it went.

My Third Little Angel

2010-10-01T20:20:00.000-07:00

I thought of you and closed my eyes,
And prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a Mother,
And I know I heard him say:
A mother has a baby,
This we know is true
But, God, can you be a mother,
When your baby's not with you?
Yes, you can He replied,
With confidence in His voice
I give many women babies,
When they leave is not their choice.
Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb,
But there's no need to stay.
I just don't understand this God,
I want my baby here.
He took a breath and cleared his throat,
And then I saw a tear.
I wish that I could show you,
What your child is doing today,
If you could see your child smile
With other children who say:
I went to earth and learned the lessons,
Of love and life and fear.
My mommy loved me oh so much,
I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a mom,
Who had so much love for me.
I learned my lessons very quickly,
My mommy set me free.
I miss my mommy oh so much,
But I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear.
"Mommy don't be sad today, I'm your baby and I'm here."
So you see my dear sweet one,
Your children are okay.
Your babies are here in My home,
They'll be at heavens gate for you.
So now you see what makes a mother.
It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of
Right from the very start.
Though some on earth may not realize you are a mother,
Until their time is done.
They'll be up here with Me one day,
And you'll know that you're the best one!

Things That Make Me Smile Today

2010-09-22T16:10:00.000-07:00

Today is just one of those days where I feel "blah". Whenever I feel this way I find myself looking through pictures that make me smile. Here are a few that made me smile today.

It was difficult this baseball season to be a Mariner's fan...however, baseball always makes me smile.

Not to mention I have an amazing husband that I love so much.

Being a Vandal and watching the football game with friends makes me smile.

Visiting long time freinds in Boise make me smile. (Anna is so incredibly cute with her pregnant bump.)

Spending time with a friend from Ecuador makes me smile. It was so incredibly great seeing Martha.

Sharing cotton candy with my favorite little boy, Aidan, makes me smile. I love this kid a lot.

Going on fair rides with Aidan make me smile. I've always loved the gunny-sack slide.

There are many other things that make me smile, but for now, I will look at these pictures.

Well Hello

2010-09-09T22:13:00.000-07:00

Hi blog. It's been a while. My life has been crazy, fun and I'm enjoying it. School is back in session and I'm learning that my "normal" life (whatever that my be) quickly comes to an end during the month of September. Only the month of September. I hope.

The last couple of weeks of summer were filled with a couple of weddings, a trip to Boise and our 7th anniversary. OUR 7TH ANNIVERSARY! (I love him. A lot.) Oh, I forgot to mention the moving of ALL of my stuff back into my classroom, but a different room from last year. A classroom right across the hall from my 1st classroom is the new location of Mrs. MacDonald. Moving took some time, but I took my time this year because I had the time. What a difference it has made knowing that I had my job for this year at the end of last year versus getting hired a day and a half before school starts.

I have so much I want to share about my classroom and my students (they are adorable and I already love them so much), but now's not the time. I need sleep and with it already being 10:00 p.m. (or rather just a little after 10:00) I must go to bed. I just wanted to make sure I posted something for the mom-in-law. I feel like I've neglected her because I know she checks daily for the new happenings in my life. (I'll try to better at posting, but I can't make any promises.)

I'll share more later...and post some pics of weddings, trips and school.

Good night, Sonja....and the rest of the world.

Mt. Rainier

2010-08-19T22:49:00.000-07:00

I want to write more about my adventure to Mt. Rainier, but for now I will just share a couple of pics.

When I saw this I peed my pants with excitement (not really, but close). So close yet so much further to hike.

Getting closer.

And closer.

Yes! I made it!

More stories and pics to come later. I'm going back to the mountain...and soon!

Dairy Update

2010-08-16T11:34:00.000-07:00

Just a quick little update for my readers....

The first week without dairy was extremely difficult. There were two incidents where I forgot about the "no dairy" and accidentally had some cheese. Oops. However, that slice of pizza from Belltown Pizza was absolutely amazing. Second encounter with dairy was at a birthday party. I simply forgot and as I and couple of my best friends devoured a bowl of yummy jalapeno/artichoke/parmesan dip I remembered afterwards...when my stomach was screaming at me.

Overall, after the first week, I feel pretty good. Although, I'm beginning to wonder if there might be more than dairy that is causing my "touchy tank" to go haywire. I fear that there might be a bit of a gluten intolerance (thanks for the reminder, Mrs. Rice). I'll battle the gluten next month. For now my focus is no dairy.

Off to play in my classroom. Have a great day everyone!

My Stomach Hurts

2010-08-11T17:06:00.002-07:00

I wish I could say that "my stomach hurts" refers to sharing hours of laughter with friends, but unfortunately it doesn't. My stomach hurts every time I eat. It's a mystery and I'm determined to get to the bottom of it. I've had numerous doctor's visits to try to figure out the mystery. Even to the point of having a colonoscopy a few years back (sorry if that's too much information shared). A bill of clean health was given; although, I was labeled with IBS (irritable bowel syndrome). Basically this means, "We have no idea what is wrong with you and your crazy ideas of stomach pain so we will label you with IBS."

Once I was labeled with IBS I began, for a short while, being very diligent as to what I was eating. Apparently there are certain foods vs. other foods that can cause a "flare up" or a gut wrenching ache for hours. So, here I go (again) where I am going to try to figure out what is making me feel the way I do.

My first step is an elimination diet. This means that for a period of time I will eliminate certain food or food types from my daily diet. The second portion of this process is journaling everything I eat, time of day I eat, how much I eat, how I feel before and after I eat (emotionally and physically)....

The second step is to actually stick with it so I can (hopefully) figure out what makes me feel awful.

The hardest part about all of this is I LOVE FOOD. All kinds of food. I also love cooking and baking. This is going to be challenging, but I'm hoping I will get the stomach aches figured out.

So, here I go...the next 30 days...no dairy. (Big sigh...I love cheese.)

"Well Begun is Half Done"

2010-08-10T17:34:00.002-07:00

One of my favorite movies is Mary Poppins and today as I began unstacking, rearranging, tossing out, and rearranging some more I thought how nice it would be to have Mary Poppins by my side. If only it could be as simple as a snap of the finger and my classroom could be set up, everything in it's perfect place and completely ready for my students.

In thinking of Mary Poppins today, I was reminded of what I experienced my first year of teaching and where I would like to go from there.

Last year in hearing that I was not going to have a job at Sandburg for this year...

Jane: Mary Poppins, we won't let you go!

Mary Poppins: Go? What on earth are you talking about?

Michael: Didn't you get sacked?
Mary Poppins: Sacked? Certainly not. I am never sacked!

Jane: Oh, Mary Poppins!

Jane, Michael: Hurrah, hurray, hurray, hurray, hurray, hurray...

Mary Poppins: Neither am I a Maypole. Kindly stop spinning about me.

That's right! I'm back at Sandburg teaching 6th grade! Now, how can I best put my students to work and trick them into learning while having fun?...

Mary Poppins: Our first game is called Well Begun is Half-Done.
Michael: I don't like the sound of that.

Mary Poppins: Otherwise titled Let's Tidy up the Nursery. (How about the classroom?)

Michael: I told you she was tricky.

After everything is in it's place, I get to be Mrs. MacDonald and teach them life skills because that's what really matters, right?

Mary Poppins: Never judge things by their appearance... even carpetbags. I'm sure I never do.

Well, maybe I should start with classroom rules...

Mary Poppins: We can't have them gallivanting up there like kangaroos, can we?

But, most importantly, I want my students to be themselves, learn from one another and have fun.

Mary Poppins: In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. You find the fun, and - SNAP - the job's a game! ("job" could be replaced with homework, task, errand, class work, group work, etc.)

And although it would be nice to be Mary Poppins, I know that all I can be is myself, Mrs. MacDonald. However, it wouldn't be so bad if my students thought I was like Mary Poppins every now and then...

Mary Poppins: As I expected. "Mary Poppins, practically perfect in every way."

Inbetweenie

2010-08-06T17:02:00.002-07:00

Today is Hannah's birthday. Usually I have Hannah Thursday's, but today was Hannah Friday because I had a writing conference I was at yesterday. It just happened to be Hannah's birthday today. How exciting! I absolutely love birthdays! I have great birthday memories from when I was a little girl (maybe a later post). Hannah's day with me began with a HUGE cupcake balloon, 6 rainbow chip cupcakes with rainbow chip frosting, and a suprise visitor...Mrs. Raines. Mrs. Raines was Hannah's second grade teacher who also happens to be a dear friend of mine. Next we headed to the Pancake House for breakfast where we delighted ourselves with omelettes, blueberry pancakes and amazing potatoes. (I mean AMAZING!) After breakfast we went and found a cozy piece of grass on Mercer Island where we parked ourselves for the next couple of hours watching the Seafair air show. Talk about breathtaking, heart pounding and tearfully proud to be an American moments. (I'm now in love with the Blue Angels.)

Let me back up a bit....(This next little bit is one of the many reasons I love children.)

As we were driving to Mercer Island Mrs. Raines, Hannah and I were talking about our "favorites" that we had in common. The conversation went as follows....

Mrs. MacDonald: "What's your favorite model of car?"
Hannah: "What do you mean?"
Mrs. MacDonald: "Well, for example, I like Volkswagen Bugs. The old kind, not the newer kind. The Beetles."
Hannah: "Oh, I like...hmm...I like Toyotas."
Mrs. Raines: "I like Audi's. Like the Audi A4 or A6."
(Silence...which very rarely happens with Hannah. Then a thought occurred in her curious, cute and innocent little brain.)
Hannah: "You mean like belly buttons?"
(Mrs. Raines and I shared a look of confusion with one another.)
Hannah: "You know. Like an innie or an outie?"
(Laughter echoed in the car, or rather cackling bellowed from Raines and myself.)
Mrs. MacDonald: While laughing, "Yes, like an innie or an outie."

We all continued to laugh so hard and the conversation progressed into the curiosity of a 9 year old and what would a person have if they had both an innie and an outie.

The final conclusion was if you don't have an innie or an outie then you must have an inbetweenie.

Happy birthday, Hannah. I'm glad Mrs. Raines and I got to share it with you.

New Day

2010-08-04T07:57:00.000-07:00

Yesterday hit me and it hit me hard.

However, last night we went over to the Barrans' and the warm hugs, a dear friend telling me it's going to be okay and the love from three little ones made everything a little better. Besides how could the day continue to be filled with anger and hate and jealousy when I am holding and sharing moments with this....

What's Really on My Mind Today

2010-08-03T16:41:00.000-07:00

Today just happens to be one of those days. One of those days that I would like to push deep inside and not think about. I want it to go away, but apparently it's not supposed to. I suppose it's God's way of letting me know that I'm not in control and He is. That I need to depend on, talk to and give everything to Him. How difficult this is and how mad this makes me.

It's not a mystery or suprise to anyone that my heart desires to be a mom. I've already lost two and I don't want to lose any more. I fear this. I fear this greatly. I just have so much anger today. Anger towards God. Anger towards life's circumstances. Anger and hate. I want this to go away too. I'm not an angry or hateful person, but today I feel this way.

Why can't I be a mom? I know that there are many women who face the challenge of getting pregnant, but today that doesn't make my situation any easier. Today I'm selfish and only thinking about me. Why me? Why has God not allowed me to be a mom yet? Why are we challenged again with not being able to start a family? I'm tired of waiting. I don't want to be patient anymore. I want my own. I want to be a mom.

I'm also challenged with so many friends around me who are pregnant, having babies, or those that already have families. Honestly, I'm jealous. Very jealous...then sad and angry again.

I don't understand. I guess I'm not supposed to. Maybe that's what God is trying to tell me too.

I hope tomorrow is a better a day.

I hope one day I can be a mom.

Lions and Tigers and bears AND VAMPIRES? Oh my!

2010-07-23T13:15:00.000-07:00

A couple weeks ago I took a trip with a friend around the Olympic Peninsula (the OP). The main purpose for our trip was to go and see the "big to-do" about Forks, WA and the Twilight drama. I've read the Twilight series, mainly because my sixth graders were interested in the story, but I'm not OBSESSED with this vampire-werewolf hype. Nonetheless, the trip was entertaining, fun and adventerous and did not only involve blood-thirsty vampires, but a great trip to the coast.

Road trip with "411".

Who names a town "Humptulips"? This made for a good laugh the entire trip.

We really wished we had a giant spoon or spork to hold.

We visited the Ho, I mean Hoh Rain Forest.

Took a little hike in the forest.

Saw really big trees.

Sweet little forts. I wanted to be 7 again so I could play and let my imagination run freely.

A rare find nowadays. How ironic that it is covered in moss.

Back to Forks to get "Dazzled by Twilight".

Twilight in this town is out of control and absolutely crazy.

I can't decide if the people are insane or smart.

They have mass marketed everything! I mean EVERYTHING!

Even the bait and tackle shop had fishing supplies named after Twilight characters.

We played along with the craziness and took a tour.

I'm still ashamed to say I paid for a tour, but the entertaining tour guide made it well worth it.

Apparently Forks believes in vampires...8.5. How do you get half of a vampire?

Bella's house from the movie.

The Cullen's house...not from the movie, but more like the description from the book.

Bella's truck from the movie. I like this truck...I want one.

Okay, maybe they are crazy. There is a reserved parking spot at the hospital for Dr. Cullen.

Hello people! Dr. Cullen doesn't exist!

Jacob's house and Bella's motorcycle from the movie.

La Push where the Quileute Tribe resides and where cliff scenes are filmed in the movie.

The Treaty Line.

Apparently Forks is threatened by vampires more than fires.

The coast! Well, actually it is the Strait of Juan de Fuca.

We camped a night here.

In the morning we went exploring.

The tide was at it's lowest level for the month.

Where the green line is on the rocks, just below the trees, is the high tide level.

Crazy, but lots of fun looking around.

Dungeness Crab Spit. Also known as "The Spit".

At low tide, which we happen to hit perfectly, you can walk all they way out to the lighthouse.

Did we do this? No. It would've been 10 miles round trip and we weren't prepared for that.

Next time...maybe.

Fun forts on the beach.

Drift wood has the most beautiful views of the coast.

This made me chuckle...a lot...okay, maybe cackle until I was crying and almost peed my pants.

Who's responsible for naming the streets out to "The Spit"?

Ferry ride home...not ready to go home, but on our way.

I think I'll come up for air now...this was a long post.

Kaely's Get Away

2010-07-19T15:58:00.000-07:00

This is Kaely (and her husband Jason). Kaely is my sister-in-law. How lucky I am to have a sister like Kaely. Kaely just entered her 30's (Happy Birthday, Kael!) and Jason brought her over to the west side of the state for a little get away. A get away from kids and work. A get away for just the two of them. How blessed we were to spend some time with Kael and Jason on their little get-away.

I love you, Kaely. Thanks for being an amazing sister-in-law. (Jason, you're not so bad yourself.)

The Cabin

2010-07-07T09:56:00.000-07:00

Growing up my family spent our summer vacations camping around the northwest. Chad grew up spending his summers at The Cabin. The past 15 years (Wow! I can't believe it's been that long.), we have spent summer vacation time out at The Cabin. The Cabin is this peaceful little get away on the Spokane River out of Post Falls, Idaho. I've come to love the time that we get to spend there...because it is so peaceful and fun.

The Cabin has inspired this post because we have a little tradition of spending the 4th of July at The Cabin. Our Cabin time is usually spent doing a variety of activities...jet skiing, boating, swimming, kayaking, drinking, playing horse shoes, archery, sitting around the camp fire, playing cards/board games, reading, non-stop eating...basically continuous fun. This 4th of July felt a little different, calmer perhaps, if that's possible. Perhaps the fact that the water was cold and the outside temp barely peaked 60 degrees had an effect on our cabin activities this year. Nonetheless, The Cabin is something that I didn't grow up having or spending "vacation" time there, but I'm thankful that I have this peaceful place to look forward to every summer and especially the 4th of July.

Thanks Bob and Sonja for a peaceful place to come home to during the summer.

Enjoy a few pics from our 4th at The Cabin this year.

Peaceful reading.

Ladder ball.

Snacking...continuously.

Playing in the sand.

Sparklers.

Ooo. Sparklers.

Uncle Chad time.

Nervous dog.

Aunt Robin time.

4th of July parade.

Grandma time.

The Giver

2010-07-06T12:29:00.000-07:00

I'm not a reader and I never really have been. Then last year I became a 6th grade teacher and I had students that absolutely loved reading. Every free minute that I gave them they would read. I also had students that didn't enjoy reading and it was a constant battle to try to get them to crack open any book. After a while that was a battle that I did not try to conquer and requested from my students that during silent read time the least that they could do was to look like they were reading. I remember telling my students up front that not everyone enjoys reading. I don't enjoy reading. However, I tried to tell them that it doesn't matter what you read as long as you find something that interests you. I gave them the example that it's difficult for me to get cozy and curl up with a book and read for hours on end like Chad. If you give me a fitness, health or running magazine, however, I will be lost in the pages for a short period of time. Chad enjoys reading, not me.

Well, as a 6th grade teacher I felt it my responsibility to know what books my students were interested in. At the beginning of the school year there was a big buzz about the Twilight series. So...there I found myself one day at the Kirkland library checking out the Twilight series. I read the entire series and realized reading wasn't so bad. Maybe I had found something that I liked. Throughout last year I read aloud various books to my students and I enjoyed seeing the curiosity on their faces of what was going to happen in the next paragraph, page, or chapter in the book. One of my favorites that I read aloud was Danny, Champion of the World by Roald Dahl. If you haven't read this, I highly recommend it. I recommend any book by Roald Dahl actually.

I have a fairly large classroom library (thank you Mrs. Rice), but I have no idea what fills my shelves. Throughout the school year my students organized my books and placed them in categories according to genre. I'm trying to make it a goal to read through a fair amount of them this summer. This is a huge and a bit daunting of a task, but I want to know, I need to know, what my students are reading. I began with a historical fiction book about a young boy who goes off to fight in the Civil War. It was okay, but I struggled to get through it. This weekend I read through two books, both fiction. One was a ghostly-murder-mystery type book (I can't remember the title) and it kept my interest, but I had bad dreams. I don't do well with scary stories, movies, t.v. shows, etc. The other book I read this weekend was The Giver.

The Giver. The Giver was an odd book, but I liked it. I have a class set and would love to read it with my class, but I don't think it is appropriate for a 6th grader. The Giver is deep. The Giver made me question what my life would be like without individuality? What if I was told who I had to marry, how many kids I could have, or what occupation I would be given? What if I had to wear the same clothes as everyone else? What if my birthday was celebrated on the same day of everyone else that turned 32 this year? What if I couldn't have feelings? What if I didn't know where I was going after death? What if I couldn't believe in Christ? What if...

I know that I would not do very well in a society where I was told what and how to do everything.

Go read The Giver by Lois Lowry. It's a great book! Then please explain the ending to me because I didn't get it.

Motivation for Second Half Marathon

2010-06-28T14:27:00.000-07:00

It's official. I'm hooked. I don't know what it is nor can I describe it (because I've tried to to Chad) the excitement of waking up between 4:00-4:30 a.m. and heading to a foot race. Whether I'm running a 5K, 10K, or half marathon, I get excited. A rush of adrenaline (I suppose that's what it is) races through my body. I can't sleep the night before because I'm so excited, or maybe anxious and nervous for the next day. I'm not quite sure what the feeling is, but I do know that I'm completely hooked on running, I don't necessarily enjoy the training, but the race itself I absolutely love. Which makes the training worth every minute in the end.

Since February I have been training for my second half marathon. I ran my first half marathon about a year ago and when I finished that race I told myself I would never do another one. I even made Chad promise me that he would not let me sign up for another half marathon. I absolutely hated the way I felt after the race...I couldn't walk for about 3 days. Seriously, I COULD NOT WALK! Quite frankly that scared me...a lot. I was content not ever running another half, although my fondness of running was still there.

So, like I said, back in February, a friend of mine came to me and said something to the aspect of, "I need to get my life back on track and I want to do something for myself. I want to run a half marathon. Will you do it with me?" Way to start small, was my first thought. (Did I mention my friend is a high achiever, determined and maybe a bit stubborn? All great qualities, of course.) My friend, not being a runner nor having a runners physique (her words, not mine) I thought at the time was crazy. (She's still kind of crazy, but that's why I love her.) She continued to share with me that I could say no, but honestly, how do you tell a dear friend "no" when they reach out to you?

There we began, back in February...running. Mind you, I had not done very much running since the last half. Or shall I say long distance running. My runs consisted of 1 maybe 2 times a week and at the most 3 miles. I began with interval running where I would walk 2 minutes, run 2 minutes, walk 2 minutes and so on and so forth. I had to build up my stamina again. The interval running changed a little bit and when I could run a 10 minute mile comfortably, I switched from interval running to timed running. I would run non-stop beginning with 20 minutes, slowly working my strength and stamina upto 10 miles, as layed out in our half marathon training schedule. Now my friend and I did not necessarily train together, rather we were accountability partners. It was awesome and an excellent motivator. However, every Sunday after church we would do our "long runs" together. Our first long run consisted of 2 miles. Oh how easy a 2 mile run is right now.

In the end, race day came and we both successfully completed the half marathon, my second and my friend's first. The difference between last year and this year...I could walk after the race and I immediately wanted to sign up for another half marathon. It's a rush, a high that I don't understand. Quite frankly it's down right crazy. I'm so INCREDIBLY PROUD of my friend for running her first half marathon. I know how challenging it was for her, both physically and mentally...although I doubt she would share or maybe even admit that, which is perfectly okay.

My new motivation for running is my dear friend who was determined and she did it. She ran her first half marathon. I'm proud of her.

Now, onto another friend...she will be running her first 5K before the summer is over with!

Hole, Rachel, Molly and A Little Bit of God Mixed In

2010-06-23T17:20:00.000-07:00

I feel so blessed to have amazing friends in my life. I have friends all over the world and due to the wonderful world of Facebook and blogs, I'm able to connect, talk to them or "stalk" them on a regular basis. I feel like I have many "stages" of friends. The stages of friends represent the "stages" of my life. This kind of makes me sad (because life passes by so quickly), but at the same time extremely blessed to know that God has always surrounded me with people that love me, take care of me and know my heart. I get a little emotional just thinking about it (I know. Big surprise on the whole emotional thing. Maybe I should refer to it as passionate, rather than emotional.) I forget to thank God for the simple things in life. The love that He provides me and surrounds me with. The things that, all too easily, are taken for granted.

This post inspired me because from the previous post I had three close friends from different stages of my life share a comment. These three friends mean the absolute world to me. I would drop everything to be there for them and it makes me feel good to know, without doubt, they would do the same for me. The irony of it all, for me anyway, is that these three friends do not know each other.

Gina, "Hole", lives in northern Idaho and we first met in high school. I don't recall the details, but from what we've been told we got into a fight on the basketball court. Gina and I played on rival high school teams. God only knew that a few years down the road we would become sorority sisters, in each others weddings and honestly friends forever. I don't get to see or talk to Hole all that often, but when I do we pick up right where we left off. Hole and I have many fun memories together...beginning college memories. I love being with Hole because the friendship is simple yet so rewarding. She understands small town Idaho (Northern. There's a difference from southern.) I miss her and don't tell her enough how much her friendship means to me. Thank you, Hole. (Hug from afar.)

Rachel. Just thinking about Rachel makes me well up with happy tears. I met Rachel my last year at U of I. We were RA's together in the Tower. Actually, we were just on duty together one night a week. Looking back, it's amazing how God worked our worlds together, but He definitely knew that we were going to need one another. I don't recall the first time I met Rachel, but the two of us have shared and been through some difficult life challenges. A suicidal student, the death of a friend, bible studies and shared hearts, and the loss of our babies are just the beginning. Through Rachel's dedicated love and given heart to the Lord, she has inspired me to be more trusting in Him. Again, Rachel is another friend that I don't talk to on a regular basis, but when we do we are able to catch up right where we left off. I love that. Thank you, Rachel. Praying for you. (This pic I stole from Rachel's FB page. I do not have any pics of the two of us post-digital camera. This just means I need to come visit Rachel soon! Ben and Rachel are so cute!)

Molly. Molly makes my heart skip a beat. I know. Sounds corny, but it's true. Molly is my now-forever friend. Again, corny, but she is a friend that I see at least twice a week (okay, probably more and if I could I'd want to see her every day). The story of how the two of us met is a little bit longer, only because the details are fresher. I met Molly almost 7 years ago when Chad and I moved to the Seattle area. A young couple that lived next door to where we first lived invited us to attend their church. So we went along. I believe the first person I met at church was Michelle Harris, who happened to be the pastor's wife. The second person I was introduced to was AmandaVaughn because we both liked to scrapbook. The third......was Molly. It was a typical, awkward, churchy introduction; however, that next week we went out to dinner (boys included). To this day we still get a laugh at how the evening went at Belltown Pizza. Conversation was as follows (or there abouts) as we are looking over menus:

"So...um...how shall we order?"

"I don't know. What do you guys like?"

"Just about anything, but this and this (pointing to the menu) are really good."

"Alright, sounds good."

"Let's order a couple and share."

"So....um...what are you going to get to drink?"

"I was thinking a beer."

"They drink beer." (Followed by big sighs and much laughter.)

And thus led to a forever lasting friendship with the 4 of us.

I can't explain the friendship that Molly and I share, but it is one that I should thank God for daily. Honestly, I'm speechless about the friendship that we share. Laughs, tears, heartaches, life....we've been there for each other. I feel like I've known Molly forever, but it's only been 7 years. She means the world to me. Thank you, Molly. I love you.

Making A List and Checking it Once

2010-06-22T08:53:00.000-07:00

Summer supposedly arrived yesterday, although the weather was questionable, and today is a beautiful day. Summer has arrived today.

There are many perks to being a teacher and one of those happens to be having a couple months off during the summer. Well, at least most teachers do and I happen to be one of them. I have a list of things I want to do this summer, both fun and not so fun, and I've made a list at the beginning of every summer for the past few years. This summer will be no different; however, I hope to check more of my items off of my lists.

Not so fun list:

clean the carpets
clean the front closet
clean out Chad's closet
clean out my closet
organize the linen closet
clean out our storage
file all our personal paperwork in the bottom of Chad's closet
clean out the kitchen cupboards

I'm sure there is more that I need to clean and organize...

The fun to do list:

hike Mt. Si
visit Mt. St. Helens
take the ferry to the jetti
visit Mt. Rainier
hike the ice caves
travel to Idaho
get baptized
see the fuss about Forks where Twilight was filmed
go canoeing
play with nieces and nephews
go through all my classroom stuff and organize it
walk Green Lake weekly
go see the horse races
go see the car races
eat lunch at the new Hard Rock Cafe in Seattle
GO TO THE ZOO! I LOVE THE ZOO!

I'm sure thare are many more fun things to add to my list, but for now this will do.

Happy summer everyone!

My Dad

2010-06-21T07:29:00.000-07:00

In honor of Father's Day I thought I would write about my dad.

I love my dad. My dad and I haven't always had the relationship that we do now...one of love, forgiveness, laughter...but I'm thankful for all that we have gone through to have the kind of relationship that we do today.

When I think of my dad the first two things that come to mind are easy going and funny. I don't think my dad has always been easy going, but he has always been funny. He's fun to be around and I enjoy his company. I enjoy his "we'll get to it, when we get to it" kind of attitude, especially when we are with each other. He takes in the moments when we are together and I really like that. My dad likes to kid around. I love when I'm with my dad and he doesn't care what others think...he's always silly and I like that about him.

My dad is very generous and he always has been. He's generous of his time. He is very helpful and he will go out of his way to help others. My dad can also be a hard worker. I say can be because it depends on the circumstances and situations. He's worked for the same company for 30 years now...I'll just say he's getting the retirement itch and his hard working days are getting less and less.

I love my dad and wished we lived closer. When we are together people say we are just alike...we act alike, we talk alike, our mannerisms become one in the same...I'm a clone of my dad. Okay, not really, but we are very similar. I talk to my dad almost every day on the phone. I miss my dad. He's amazing and I'm thankful for him.

Good Morning Crossword

2010-06-18T10:19:00.000-07:00

School's out for summer and I have bittersweet feelings. Leading up to the last day of school I was an emotional wreck. Between packing up my entire classroom, saying goodbye to my 6th graders-my first class, saying goodbye to staff that I have worked with the last year and not knowing if I have a job next year...I've been pretty emotional. (Thank goodness I have such an understanding and patient husband.) However, now that summer break has arrived my emotions have subsided and now I have to be the patient one as I eagerly wait to hear where I will be placed in the district for next year. The anticipation is killing me, but I know God is looking out for me.

As I wait patiently and summer is here I realized today how much I have missed my summer morning routine. I'm an early riser. I haven't always been that way and I think my getting-up-early routine started when I had my Extended Day job working with students before and after school. I had to be at work by 6:00 in the morning...I think my body has now adapted to that and every day I'm wide awake by 5:30-6:00. This morning when I rolled out of bed (however, not at 6:00) I was delighted to have some time to myself. Time to turn the kettle on for some tea, water my plants and sit down to work on the NY Times and Seattle Times daily crossword. Good morning crossword...how I've missed you.

Monsters, Monin!

2010-06-06T21:37:00.001-07:00

The past couple of years we have had a bi-weekly (and sometimes weekly) tradition at our house and not many are aware of this tradition. It all started with Aidan and quickly grew to Gia (Delia). And I predict that in due time Liam will also fall into the regular viewing of a favorite at Uncle Tad and Aunt Monin's house. By the time Aidan has half a foot in our front doorway, he is already mid-question, "Monin can we watch Monsters, please?" Not far behind him is Gia shouting, "Monsters, Monin!" It's nearly impossible to say "no" to a bright-blue-eyed-polite-soft-spoken-little-boy and his sidekick who happens to be bright-blue-eyed-cute-as-a-button-little-girl. With no twisting of the arm, I push play on the DVD player (because the movie has a permanent spot in the CD carousel labeled 1) and away we go, watching Monsters, Inc. for the next hour and a half....well, at least the kiddos do.

I wanted to write about this because this past Saturday night, Aidan spent the night at our house. We didn't have a chance to watch Monsters because we took him to my school's play. When we got home it was approaching bed time and the routine was as usual; however, this time the questioning of whether we could watch Monsters began on the way home from the theater. When we got home there was a diversion of Monsters because Uncle Tad suggested we have icecream before bed. Perfect!

Sunday morning as I was getting dressed, I heard a little soft-spoken-sleepy-voice from the bedroom, "Monin, can we watch Monsters?" Without fail and again, no twist of the arm, I went into the other room, scooped up a sleeply little boy, pushed play on the DVD player and there we were...snuggled on the couch at 6:30 a.m. watching Monsters. I loved every minute of it.

Uncle Chad

2010-06-05T14:28:00.001-07:00

I came across this picture when I was posting my last few pics. My husband is the most amazing uncle to all our nieces and nephews (including the ones that aren't are true nieces and nephews). The kids flock to Chad wherever we go. They love "Uncle Chad" or "Uncle Tad" as a few of the kids call him. Chad is an amazing uncle. I watch him care for, spend time with, have the patience for, and truly love the kids around him and the kids that are in our lives. I can't wait to see him holding one of our own...hopefully one day.

Coleman and Reese with Uncle Chad.

People Pictures

2010-06-05T12:52:00.000-07:00

I love people. The more the merrier. Often when we invite people over it begins with just a couple and within minutes it turns into 3, then 7, then 10 and so on. I love surrounding myself with the people that I love, my friends and family. However, I also enjoy being immersed in the mix of people I don't know, but only in open, public places. Markets, festivals, parades...this kind of stranger immersion is what I like. Places I can people watch. I loooove people watching.

Continuing from my previous post, I enjoy taking pictures. Pictures that capture a moment, pictures of people that I love, pictures of food, pictures of scenery, silly pictures, but most importantly I like taking pictures that capture my life or people in my life.

My birthday sundae with Aidan. I like this picture because I have no idea that he is making a silly face and after the picture was taken he was cracking up.

Every time I look at this picture I cry...a mix of happy and sad tears. I love this picture because both baby Liam and I are so mesmorized with Godly happenings. Words can't explain how I feel about this kiddo.

I'm very thankful for the relationship I share with my dad and how it has evolved over time...for the better. I love my dad and miss him so much. We are very much alike.

Another picture I love. (of course, otherwise I wouldn't be sharing). I love the simple smile on Coleman's face as he squirts Grandma with his water gun.

I feel all happy inside when I see this picture. Pure joy and fun that can be had at the cabin with Grandpa AND a Grandpa that is so eager to show ALL the toys and fun to be had with Coleman.

This was a tougher post than expected. I've looked through my pictures for hours and have many more I would like to share. For now, this will have to do.

Picture Perfect

2010-06-03T18:27:00.001-07:00

My goal of posting once a week, well, lasted only one week. So, here I am (two weeks later) trying to get in another post. I originally started this blog to keep family and friends updated on our lives--beings that we moved sooo far away from home (sense the sarcasm, please). I still want to continue to share about what is going on in our lives, but for today, and probably only today, I'm going to share one of the things I enjoy doing...taking pictures.

I love taking pictures and mainly for the purpose of documenting my life. I carry my camera EVERYWHERE I go. My camera is a rinky-dink little camera that I bought a few years ago when I finally decided to upgrade from rolls of film to a digital. I like to take pictures of anything and everything...I'm not real picky, but I really enjoy taking pictures of the things I like. To some, my pics are meaningless, but to me they paint a picture perfect. Here are just a few simple things that I enjoy...

...dark beer. Although Guiness isn't that dark of a beer.

Baseball season...I'm a loyal fan to the Mariners.

Fresh flowers in the market...this was at Pike Street Market in Seattle.

Clear days in Seattle with views of the mountains that surround us. (Mt. Rainier)

Traveling to unknown places. (Guatemala)

More sharing to come later....

My Goal...

2010-05-17T20:43:00.000-07:00

...is to post at least once a week. I like blogging, but lately I haven't been very good about it. So I've decided that maybe if i set a goal (a realistic one) then I can work towards that. Once I meet my one post a week goal then maybe I will up the ante a bit...say two a week.

So the post for this week is a random mix of thoughts in various areas of my life...

1. Work: I love my students and teaching 6th grade, but am ready to move on. More or less, I'm ready for summer and ready for my 6th graders to be in junior high. I currently don't have my position at Sandburg for next year (sad) and I don't know what God has in store for me, but I have faith that He will place me in the right school and teaching the grade that I need to be teaching (Please God, don't put in a grade lower than 2nd grade...I don't think I can handle it.)

2. Running: I'm excited to share that I feel on target for my training and I feel comfortable with how my body feels along with my time for my long runs. I have 6 weeks until my race. I'm still contemplating a marathon...maybe Chicago.

3. Relationships: I don't have enough time in the day for all the people in my life that I love. I wish my days were longer. I wish I had the time to deepen the existing relationships and expand on newer relationships that are forming. I miss my family too.

4. Family: I love my husband and I forget to thank God for the amazing man that he is and how fortunate I am to have him in my life. I'm excited and scared for changes that are hopefully coming our way....the big ones: house, family, job...

My post for the day...complete with a fun picture because I love pictures.

Becca, Molly, myself and Laura at a Mariner's game. I love these girls and I love baseball!

Hiatus

2010-04-03T10:37:00.000-07:00

Hiatus from the blog that is. My last post was a little over a month ago (sorry Sonja, I know you look at this daily). Our lives continue to move forward...mainly with work. We've stayed close to home the last month and haven't been getting into much trouble. I suppose this is a good thing, although I enjoy finding a little bit of trouble every now and then.

Looking back at the last month, both Chad and I have been extremely busy with work. Chad's been busy with the start-up of a side business making putters (check out the website here http://www.pollengolf.com/) and I was trying to stay afloat with a grading period coming to a close and parent teacher conferences. I'm thankful that report cards and conferences are over.

Here's a look at the last month through pictures (I love pictures...pictures are in order from oldest to newest)!

6th Annual Shit Bowl

This year the pre-superbowl football game has significantly slower and the boys were more "generous" with one another...I think it's because they are getting old.

Chad and the few other guys that he is working with on the "side business" presented their product at the Seattle Golf Show and they were the talk of the show. They hosted a putting competition and had the best looking booth. I'm so proud of Chad for his accomplishments and how hard he works.

I'm having difficulties downloading photos...there will be more photos on a separate post. Until then, you will just have to admire Chad and all his glory from the depths of the mud on the field to the hi-light of his side business.

Happy spring everyone!

Liam=Healed Heart

2010-03-02T22:19:00.001-08:00

I'm in love with him.

Delia is going to be the greatest big sister. She's in love with him too.

Aidan is super excited to have a little brother. What a helpful big brother he is going to be.

The Past Twenty Days

2010-03-02T21:02:00.000-08:00

(Warning: this is lengthy.)

I try to keep this updated because I know that there are a few of you that check on this weekly, if not daily. However, I've been a little preoccupied with a few other things...okay, mainly three things: my job, training for a half marathon and my healing heart.

My job. My job is wearing me out and maybe in a good way, but I'm tired. I love everything about my job, but recently it has pushed me to my max. I go back and forth on whether or not I push myself too hard, which this could be a huge part of "the wearing out", but I also am tired of the 11- and 12-year old spoiled-brat-behaviors. I try to look past this and most days I can, but the last couple of weeks have been challenging. (I'm incredibly thankful for my students that are respectful, hard learners.) I'm also tired of the pressure, the pressure coming from the district to teach "this" by a certain date, have this assessment completed within this time frame, have high achieving students, etc. I would love to know who is creating these timelines and providing/choosing the curriculum that I am to teach because I guarantee they haven't been in a classroom in 10-plus years and they have absolutely no idea what teachers are faced with and the lack of time they have available to actually teach in a given day. Grades are due in 5 days and it's "my responsibility" to pass all my students. Really? Pretty sure the last time I checked I can't "pass" my students on my own because, in all honesty, there are many students that shouldn't be passed. Teachers need that support from home and I understand that there are circumstances and I'm flexible with that, but after weeks and weeks of hearing, "I couldn't do my homework because I had basketball/soccer/band/choir all weekend", or "I didn't have time becuase we went to Mexico/Canada/insert any other country in the world", or "I spent the weekend at our ski resort cabin", I'm going crazy. I just want to scream, "THAT'S NOT MY PROBLEM, YOU ARE A STUDENT FIRST!!!", but I can't. I then want to scream at the parents, but again, I can't. Please don't misunderstand me, I love my job...the past couple of weeks have just been a little exhausting.

Half marathon. This is my little piece of heaven, my outlet, my saving grace. This is what keeps me sane (and God, of course). I'm training for my second half marathon and after the first one I completed, I told myself I would never do another one because of how my body felt afterwards. However, here I am--4 weeks into my 20 week training schedule. I've been going to the gym, 6 days a week, 5:oo-6:30 a.m. for 4 weeks and totally loving it! Chad calls me crazy....I can accept crazy...I'm okay with that. I'll be the crazy-wife-teacher-5:00 a.m.-gym goer. I'm okay with that.

Healing heart. Well...this is tough. The past couple of years I'm on-off-and-on again an emotional basket case when it comes to something that I (we) would like to have so much, but just haven't been able to do so. More than anything right now I would love to have a family, a child of our own (same story, different day), but God keeps reminding me (in a not so very nice way) that it's just not our time. If only I could know when, it will be our time to be parents, for me to be a mom; however, that's not how it works and I'm trying to accept that. So, (again same story, different day) I love, with all my heart, my friends' kids. I love my friends' kids as if they were my own, even the kiddos that I only see once a week or once every couple of weeks. My heart continues to heal and more recently a huge healing has occurred, a dark hole has been closed in my heart and filled with happiness that has left me speechless. Eleven days ago I saw the miracle of a new life being brought into this world. This little miracle is named Liam and I am SO in love with him. I'm thankful for my greatest friend, Molly, who let me be a part of Liam's arrival into this world. I can't say enough how much this experience has meant to me and even though I started the day completely sad, upset, scared, angry and not wanting to be therel; I left overflowing with joy, peace, happiness, hope and more importantly, a restored heart.

So, the past couple of weeks have been physically and emotionally exhausting, but I'm alive and doing okay. Now once I get past the end of this weekend, with grades being due on Monday, I will be flying high!

Students

2010-02-10T19:10:00.000-08:00

Today was a tough day and I just want to throw it away and not think about it again. I'm blogging this simply so that I can remember that I teach because I love my students, not because of the staff relations I share. If it wasn't for my students, I wouldn't have made it through the day. My goal is to focus my energy, efforts and positive attitude towards my students and not towards the negativity, chaos and craziness outside my classroom. My students don't read my blog (at least I don't think they do), but I thank them for keeping my sanity, being flexible and just being themselves. I need to be more like them...we could all learn a lot from a 6th grader (believe it or not).

I'm thankful for a couple of days off (well sort of) and I look forward to spending my mid-winter break, quietly working in my classroom without any interuptions. Maybe I can catch up....or perhaps just get some grading done. In the meantime, while working my classroom, I will dream of the warm, sunny vacations that many Kirkland families take during this time of year. If Costa Rica, Hawaii, or some other warm, tropical place was cheaper to travel to, I would probably be there instead of in my classroom (shh....don't tell my students). I do love spending time in my classroom, but a sunny get away would be nice!

Melt My Heart

2010-02-09T21:35:00.000-08:00

Today one of my students slipped and called me "mom", an honor title to be called. And although the boy was completely embarrassed, I found it extremely rewarding. I tried to play it off like all was cool, just a slip and quickly move on, but it's the small moments like this one that really make me happy to be a teacher. I'm with my students more than some of their own parents and to be called "mom" doesn't surprise me at all. Melt my heart, yes. Surprise me, no. I love my job.

Love For All

2010-02-07T10:02:00.001-08:00

A few fun pics for the day...

Sweetest and most loveable niece, Reese.

Coleman ice skating with Uncle Chad.

Surprised by a New Year's kiss. I love him.

Silly pic with our niece and nephew. I wish we saw them more.

I might steal Miss Gia, she's so darn cute. Shh...don't tell her parents.

Mackenzie makes me smile.

I love this kid...he loves his chocolate pudding!

Systems

2010-01-24T08:34:00.000-08:00

Every day I am amazed at exactly how much I learn in my classroom...what to teach, how to teach, what to say, what not to say (a big one), how things work, what doesn't work...the list is never ending. This past Friday I spent a much needed day away from my classroom and instead I was with approximately 50 new teachers at a "training day". The amount of information that I learned in a few hours was overwhelming yet extremely helpful in making me become a better teacher. After the training I swung by my old school (I miss Peter Kirk so much) and was able to spend some quality time with an impressive 6th grade team. I can't find any words to describe how thankful I am in the time they offered to share valuable information.

The most important thing I pulled away from my full day of training and advice from veteraned 6th grade teachers is to implement systems for EVERYTHING. In thinking about this, it's crazy just how many systems are/could/should be in place in a classroom. There needs to be a system for everything and I've learned that there needs to be systems in place that will make my life easier as a teacher. Here's a list to name a few...

how the kids enter the room
how the kids take attendance
where they put their personal belongings
how and when they can talk in class
how and when they can get out of their seat
how and when they can use the restroom
how they line up to go to p.e., music, library
how papers get to and from home
how communication is created to and from home
how the garbage is taken out
how the floors get cleaned
how the class library gets organized
how papers get passed out and collected
where class work and homework is turned in
how desks get cleaned
how the sink area gets cleaned
how the community supplies are shared, in place and restocked
when someone is absent how they find the work that they missed
when I need their attention, what I do and how the kids respond
how the students walk through the hallway
the noise level expectations for class work (independently, in partners, in small groups)
how information gets relayed to the office or other areas within the school
expectations for grading and how the students should grade honestly and independently
...the list is never ending and I know I'm missing 1,000 things!

There are so many systems that I can do to make my life easier as a teacher. Especially when teaching 6th graders...they can be responsible for almost everything in the classroom. Now the trick is, figuring out how to do that!

Hormones, Oh My!

2010-01-16T23:01:00.000-08:00

Since the winter break, my 6th graders have changed. They aren't my little 6th graders that they were 4 months ago. They are physically, emotionally and intellecutally changing...and they have no idea what is about to hit them.

Friday afternoon, about 15 minutes into their 30 minute lunch recess, two girls came sobbing (I mean SOBBING) into the classroom. One of the girls tried to get out through sniffles, tears and uncontrollable gasps that she was crying and she didn't know why. Just as she was saying "why" she burst into tears (again) and tried to tell me what she thought was going on, but I could barely understand her through the sniffles. Then the second girl chimed in that whenever any of her friends started crying she would just start crying and couldn't stop.

So there I sat, with two 6th grade girls squirting alligator tears, and me trying not to laugh at them. (I know, completely heartless, but still funny.) Then the first girl said (through sobs), "Mrs. MacDonald, don't laugh at us. That isn't very nice." I then sat down with them and asked them if they would like me to explain what was going on. (Insert awkward moment of silence.) And as I began to share with them that unfortunately their bodies are changing, their hormones are going nuts.... One said, "No, please don't say it."...then I continued you are probably getting ready to start your...And as I was about to say "period", the first girl WAILED, "OH, she said it." (And, yes, burst into tears again.)

This 3-minute scenario turned into 12 more minutes when 3 more girls arrived to the classroom crying, sad, upset and no clue as to why or what was going on with them. Those 12 minutes were filled with questions, concerns and comments all about being a young woman. Oh, my poor 6th grade girls...it's almost unfair watching them go through the emotional and physical changes without any control. Odd to say, but I enjoyed the moment shared with the girls. Maybe I'm the one they feel comfortable talking to...and I think that's okay.

Every now and again...

2010-01-10T20:37:00.000-08:00

...I get waves of emotion. My life will be going along just fine and something will hit and I will completely lose it and break down. I suppose that is expected. I never can quite figure out what causes the flow of emotions, when like I said, life is going along in it's perfectly happy way, but it does...and I can't stop. All day today I have been emotional...thinking about what our life would be like if we had our two angels running around...my babies to hold and love with every ounce of my being. I have dear friends who keep telling me one day it's going to happen. One day Chad and I are going to be the best parents ever. One day I am going to be a mom. One day...

I'm thankful for those friends who share those things with me, love me, tell me it's okay to feel the way I feel, and let me hold and love their children with every ounce of my being. Thank you dear friends...you mean the world to me.

Funny Moment of the Day

2010-01-05T22:08:00.000-08:00

As I sit at my desk extremely focused on the planning of a Shackleton Exploration/Antarctica Unit, the students are working very quietly (almost too quietly) at their desks. Out of the corner of my eye I see one of my students, who is a consistent class clown and most of the time absolutely hilarious, coming up towards my desk.

I do not raise my head to look up, but rather question, "(Student), what do you need?"

The student responds with, "I need help with my zipper...it's stuck."

All so quickly, the class goes into a roar of laugther and I'm thinking, dear God, he's in the 6th grade, I can't do this...but then I look up and see my "class clown" standing there in a panic and he repeats himself, "My zipper's stuck. Can you help me?"

I look up at him and try not to laugh, but the entire class is in an absolute uproar. (Insert awkward-teacher-moment/panic-stricken-6th-grade boy). The student then starts laughing, realzing what he just asked of me and can barely get out, "Not this zipper (pointing to his jeans), this one here on my binder."

The class starts laughing even harder and I begin to cry I am laughing so hard. A few seconds pass, although it seems like 5 minutes, and then the class calms down. My student is still standing at my desk and then says (trying not to laugh half way through), "No seriously, can you help me with my zipper...on my binder."

The sound of laughter from the class rises and I replay laughing, "Of course."

Student then returns to his desk...somewhat sheepishly, while everyone is still snickering.

The teacher in me pipes up, again trying not to laugh, and says, "Okay, back to work."

Note to self: I need to remember these funny teacher moments when faced with more challenging times.

Random Thoughts for the Day

2009-12-23T11:09:00.001-08:00

I'm enjoying time off and time for myself.
I'm thankful for an amazing, loving and generous husband.
Excited to see family over Christmas.
I'm always eager to make peanut butter balls, but...
Praying for dear friends who are struggling right now...you are loved.
The sun is shining and that is glorious!
I must read.
Love Christmas music.
Thankful for girlfriends.
I enjoy hot tea and crosswords in the mornings.
Unsure about my new hair cut...might end up chopping it all off now.
Did I mention I'm excited to see family? I really can't wait, but I have to.
Super excited to see friends I haven't seen in a long time...especially friends from college and camp.
Love hearing others say Merry Christmas.

It's a wonderful day today. Sending love to family and friends.

Christmas Cheer

2009-12-22T13:18:00.001-08:00

A year ago I took this picture as we were driving by the Space Needle on our way to Ballard to watch the Maldives play at the Tractor Tavern (Happy Birthday to my dear friend Molly). I absolutely love Christmas and this time of year, especially around the city. I love the smells outside and in my kitchen, I love the freindly gatherings with people we love, I love the excitement of buying, wrapping and giving presents, I love our travels to see family, I love the message shared at church during Christmas and how happy it makes my heart feel, I love the holiday music in every store...I LOVE IT ALL.

On our drive home last night from Molly and Ryan's house (dear, dear friends of ours) we were gloating, in a non-malicious way, about how great it is to be loved by so many people. The past couple of weeks we have shared more glasses of wine, great food, lots of laughter and have been surrounded by absolutely wonderful and amazing people...all who love us so much. It's somewhat overwhelming, but at the same time absolutely exciting. In return, Chad and I share that same love to others that we receive from all our friends. The feeling of love and friendship is mutual, and to think about how strong those feelings are, is even more rewarding and makes me feel all warm and happy inside. I know, sappy, right? But, it's true.

When I think about Christmas, I think about the love that we share with all our friends and family. It's an absolutely wonderful time of year...something that should not only happen once a year, but year round. We hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas filled with lots of love, friendships and laughter.

Taking the Time...

2009-12-12T15:05:00.000-08:00

Chad and I have lived in the Seattle area for almost 6 years now and often I think we forget how fortunate we are to be in such a beautiful area. On my drive to work a couple weeks ago, I was able to capture the beauty of Mt. Rainier, Lake Washington, and a majestic pink-ish colored sky through the trees. It was simply awe-inspiring and made me realize that I need to slow down in life more often. That's tough for us (me) to do, but we (I) are (am) going to work on this.

Thanksgiving in Oregon

2009-12-06T16:29:00.001-08:00

We had a great Thanksgiving with my family in Oregon. After a couple of days at Granny and Papa's house we headed up the Oregon coast. Chad is pretty good and putt-putt...me, on the other hand, not so good.

Mid-Way Stop...

2009-12-06T16:18:00.000-08:00

...at a winery! As we drove up the coast towards Tillamook, we stopped at a small winery...for a leg stretch...or for a good glass of wine.

Oregon Coast

2009-12-06T16:03:00.000-08:00

The last couple of days of our Thanksgiving break we spent driving up the Oregon Coast. Sunday was absolutely gorgeous, sunny and somewhat warm (60 degrees).

Nut Shell

2009-12-05T12:40:00.001-08:00

Here's what's been going on in our lives the past couple of weeks...

Prepping and teaching and scrambling to get everything in by Winter Break.
Small Tri Delta get together with friends from college (what a great visit).
Thanksgiving trip to Oregon.
Much needed visit with family.
Two day drive up the Oregon Coast.
Last minute planning and preparation for Outdoor Ed. trip to Canada with my 6th graders.
Christmas shopping and Christmas music being played constantly (I LOVE Christmas).
Continious Survivor gatherings on Thursday (I look forward to this every week)!
Making pico de gallo with 22 6th graders...learning about Mexcio's culture.
Final check on items packed for week long trip to Canada with 6th graders.
Looking forward to bus departure to Canada at 6:45 a.m. on Monday with approx. 80 kids.
Enjoying the glorious sunshine-winter days in Kirkland.
Girls night out with friends from church...I highly recommend The Christmas Carol in 3-D!
Woke up this morning with a head cold...hoping it goes away by Monday. (Come on netty-pot...work your magic!)
Thankful for my husband who is doing laundry because my head weighs a ton. I love him.

Good day to all. Love.

Thank You, God

2009-11-24T21:32:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I was mad. Today I am relieved, or I should say at peace. I am finished with my first round of conferences. I have a long road ahead of me, but with God by my side I know everything will be okay. I was reminded today that it's okay to have the heart that I do, to go home crying every other ngiht because I want the best for my students yet unsure as to how I am going to get them to be the best that they can be...BUT I can't do it alone. Someone shared with me today that being a Christian teacher is almost a tougher job than just being a teacher. My heart aches for my students that are lost, my students that have nobody to trust, those students that need that one-on-one support at home, but it's just not there. Sunday at church I was reminded that I can pray for my students. Duh! What was I thinking? More than anything many of my students need someone like Jesus. I'm not the type of person to "sell" Jesus...I just don't feel comfortable doing that; however, the love, care and concern that I share with my students is enough. I can't personally share Jesus' story with them, but I can share Jesus' love. Jesus loves my students, I love my students...I am praying for my students because they are lost and need love. Thank you, God.

Politically Correct

2009-11-23T20:57:00.001-08:00

I've always had a tough time at being that "politically correct" person and saying things appropriately versus just spitting out what's on my mind without the use of a filter. With close friends it's easy to NOT use my filter, because I'm in a comfortable enviroment and they would expect no less (at least, that's what I'm hoping). Over time a relationship has been established. I suppose even in a well established relationship I can open-mouth-and-insert-foot, but that's who I am. I'd like to say that it should be easy for me to speak my mind and be myself whenever, but that's not the case. So, I suppose, I CAN use my filter when I REALLY need to, although I really don't enjoy being NOT ME. One case in particular is during parent-teacher conferences.

I've witnessed my first round of parent-teacher conferneces and going into the conferences I was excited, nervous and purely anxious to see deeper into the roots of where my students have come from. I enjoy having that open communication with the parents, but honestly with today's society it's down right challenging for me to have that continious open communication...and then when all is not going as I would like it to...I want to scream at parents. In my perfect little world, my little bubble, it would be outstanding if every student could go home to "Mrs. Cleaver" with an apron on, homemade cookies fresh from the oven and a glass of milk sitting on the table for snack, and an eager mom ready to sit down with their son/daughter to help them with homework. Then once homework is finished, my students could go play softball in the streets, build forts in the neighborhood forest nearby, and ride bikes off sweet jumps. Shortly "Mr. Cleaver" comes home from work, hugs "Mrs. Cleaver" and the entire family sits down at the table for dinner. Oh-wait. My bubble has been popped.

What has happened to the value of family, the value of relationships, and the value of our education? (Oh my goodness, these could all be three separate posts where I would open-mouth-insert-foot.) Who cares if so-and-so is skilled at soccer, into theater, shopping at Abercrombie and has an I-phone (Seriously? A 12 year old does not need an I-phone!). Seriously, we don't need to be keeping up with the Joneses, unless they are like the Cleavers, of course. What about reading, writing and math? What about family time? What about a sit-down-family dinner? What about making sure your child is successful in their education? Have parents checked to see if homework is finished? I can't tell a parent that their child is failing because it's their fault. Oh how I would love to, but I can't do it. That's not being "politically correct", or shall I say "political". However, OF COURSE it will be my fault when a student is failing, but if only parents could see that I can't make a student successful all by myself. Due to the pressures of society, as a teacher I HAVE to have that support at home. I can't do it alone.

More than anything I want ALL my students to be successful. I want all my students to understand that it's okay to fail and learn from their mistakes. I yearn for my students to see achievement in their own works. I want honest and valuable support from students' home life. I want to wave my wand and make all my students' worries go away so they can be great students and have fun being kids (because they don't know how to anymore). I would love for parents to slow down, take a step back and just take that extra time to spend with their kids (preferably not in front of a t.v. or game console of some sort).

Like I said, my bubble has been popped. I have entered into a profession where I have to be politically correct. I enjoy the challenges and rewards of conferences (even though they are emotionally exhausting) and I will continue to strive to be the best teacher that I can be.